The Dartmouth Soundsystem

RIP Blog

2011-01-04T10:30:00.001-08:00

You can find me on Twitter, Facebook, & Tumblr until I start something new.

And then there was that

2010-07-30T07:35:00.000-07:00

About a month ago, the lovely Kate Theimer got in touch with me to see if I'd be up for writing a chapter on social media and archives for a SAA textbook. I said OK, albeit a little hesitantly as I'd never written anything like this before.

Today I passed in my draft and am feeling immensely relieved and a little bit proud of myself. All those pages took a while to pull together, but through a lot of late nights and help from the talented folks at Historypin, The New England Historic Genealogical Society, the Wisconsin Historical Society, Archives Next, and the CBC Digital Archives, it all came together. Working with such interesting organizations and institutions was really humbling... I'm still in awe that they even replied to my emails!

What has been great about this experience is the confidence I've gained in my own knowledge and abilities. If I'm able to pass on my experience to others and it helps them, then I must be doing things right. As someone who previously hid in the bathroom to have a panic attack before public speaking in university and had to have term papers wrenched from my hands, feeling sure of myself was pretty cool.

A few months ago I was a guest speaker at a MSVU social media class, along with the fabulous Kimberly Walsh. Before the class I fidgeted and felt my heart race, but once I started talking, everything gradually calmed down. This is stuff I know and practice every day. I understand it, and I can help others understand it. What an amazing feeling. I 'll probably always get the urge to run off and hide when asked to talk to a group... heck, even some meetings make me squirm, but I'm getting better. I'm learning to recognize myself as something other than a ball of nerves.

Zombie Transformation 2010

2010-07-12T04:50:00.000-07:00

The Halifax Zombie Walk happened yesterday. In the pouring rain. During Spain vs. Netherlands. Huh.

A zombie walk is an organized public gathering of people who dress up in zombie costumes. There is no direct motive or reasoning for the walk. It's fun to dress up. Even more fun when there's a crowd of hundreds. This year's walk took us from Camp Hill Cemetery to "the wave" on the waterfront. Police escorts and "zombie security" helped the walk to go smoothly.

I didn't go all out with my make-up/costume, because, as predicted, the rain just washed everything away.

Here's what I put together this year...

Step 1: Be naturally pale, or appy a white cream foundation. Green or grey works, too. Be sure to cover up any signs of good heath, i.e. pink lips, rosy cheeks. Zombies don't tan.

2. Apply black/brown eyeshadow around your eyes and on your cheeks to give a "sunken in" appearance.

3. Apply prosthetics, if you're going to use them. I like the Woochie brand (I used the "gash" kit, this time). Ben Nye is also great. Use spirit gum to apply. Make sure it's tacky before adhering to your skin. Don't apply over areas with hair. It will kill to take off.

4. Apply make-up on your prosthetics, especially around the edges to blend them in with your own skin. I used Woochie's Injury Stack (black, red, dark-red, yellow). Use stipple sponge to apply. Yellow is a nice touch, because your wounds will look infected.

5. I applied blood gel to the wounds sparingly. The gel melts as your skin warms it up, so it create a "bleeding" effect. I also applied red lipstick under my eyes.

6. Using the stipple sponge and injury stack again, I applied black/red/dark-red on and around my mouth. I then prepared blood gelatin (needs to be submerged in boiling water for several minutes before you can apply) and applied it in the same area. Blood gelatin will harden and remain fixed in place, but looks wet. Great for a rainy day like yesterday.

7. I splashed lots of fake blood on myself before leaving, but the rain washed it off in minutes. What a drag.

Final Product:

I was going for "Victorian" zombie... I ever wore a snood (yes, Victorian ladies wore snoods). The dress was great--almost felt bad for bloodying it up.

Zombie Behaviour Tips:

1. Zombies don't emit high-pitched squeals.
2. I don't really think they yell, either. One of the more annoying aspects of the Halifax walk is that everyone screams.
3. Dressing in "sexy" ripped clothing with BARELY any make-up is lame.
4. Dressing like a Tim Burton extra is lame.
5. Pick one: fast zombie or slow zombie. Go with it for the full walk.
6. Don't bug civilians. Obey traffic laws.
7. HAVE FUN.

Take me home.. to Meat Cove..

2010-06-30T05:52:00.000-07:00

Canada Day is tomorrow, and I haven't really made any plans yet, other than to see Andrew's brother spin at Victor's in Halifax. Tom is amazingly talented... if you can make it to a set of his, you won't be disappointed. He'll also be playing at Evolve in a month's time.

After complaining in a prior post about "waaaah I can't do anything this summer", of course a trip to Cape Breton would present itself.

That's why "The Secret" and all that new age stuff is garbage... I am nearly ALWAYS pessimistic, and I have great stuff happen to me on a regular basis. Take that, Oprah. Debbie Downers of the world, unite!

The plan is to drive up to Ingonish and spend Friday hiking/swimming, and then head down to North Sydney to spend the night. Saturday I am going to the site of my not-yet-written horror epic... MEAT COVE! In my mind, Meat Cove is home to evil cannibals named MacDonald who eat tourists and are probably friends with the Wicker Man island folks. In real life, Meat Cove is the most isolated village in Nova Scotia, and has great camping, hiking, kayaking, and so forth nearby.

I'm looking forward to having a few days to recharge and have fun. I haven't been "on vacation" (excluding long weekends) in a while, so having four days off is wonderful. Four days off in Cape Breton? Huge bonus. Lauren: 1, Dartmouth, 0.

Summer?

2010-06-17T06:01:00.000-07:00

I have this weird, creeping suspicion that this summer is going to feel v. short and uneventful.

Reasoning: tied to Dartmouth abode until mid-August and cannot abandon homestead or cat occupants for more than a few days (unless I can get a friend/family member to look after the place--not likely, as they are ENJOYING SUMMER and do not want to be tricked into staying in D-town). I do not have a car, and neither does the boyfriend. Summer roadtrips, camping, visiting friends/relatives... it may not happen. Not sure if I even have vacation at work (a whole other tale, there).

So I'm not pumped for summer like I should be.

Things that would make me excited include: visiting Newfoundland, esp. Gros Morne, hanging out with friends and family in Fredericton (lofty goals, I know), making a fake-trailer for MEAT COVE (my dream movie), going on a ladies trip to New England to shop and cause trouble, spending time in Cape Breton (essential) and seeking out ultimate revenge on the jerk teenagers who bug me at my bus stop.

I would settle for going to the beach a few times, maybe...

We'll see how this plays out.

O hai, interwebs

2010-06-02T07:35:00.001-07:00

Awkward, haven't updated in a while type Hello.

I think, somewhere around the beginning of the year, I started getting a little burnt out, internets style.

For the past few months I've tried to remedy that by not having a computer at home, staying off Twitter (for the most part) during the evening, and getting the heck out of the house. It has been a pretty positive experience, though hard as I used to watch a lot of TV/movies on my (now dead) laptop... so I haven't been watching huge amounts of films, lately. Sigh.

So, yeah, getting out of the house. I took a fairly rewarding "boot camp" style class at the Bloomfield Centre in March/April, and am now out on the Commons for a kettlebell class (first class was in the pouring rain--we're hardcore). A few friends and I have formed a hiking group. We tackled Victoria Park a few weeks ago and have plans to enjoy the outdoors and perhaps go camping throughout the summer.

Joker's Comedy Club has become a regular hang-out over the past few months. Must attend nights include: Chat Roulette Wednesdays, stand-up/sketches/improv on Sundays, and Burn, Hollywood, Burn--a monthly bad movie night that has thus far screened Troll 2, The Room, and Mac and Me. Most excellent.

Had a brief trip to Toronto over the Victoria Day weekend. Stayed in the worst part of town, but had fun seeing friends and attending Conan O'Brien's show at Massey Hall. Lauren + Coco in the same room... it was divine.

Until August I will remain in Dartmouth, which is getting more and more difficult as the weather gets nicer and festival season approaches. Even the Multicultural Festival will be in Halifax this year, v. unfortunate. I'm scouring the city for affordable, clean, 1-2 bedrooms in the south-end, Quinpool area, and north end. Have any tips? Please send them my way!

I am still at my job, but I can't really talk about the current situation for a few more weeks (silly, I know). Had the opportunity to work on the very cool Nova Scotia Historical Newspapers project, which I really enjoyed.

Blogging used to be a fairly regular thing for me, but honestly I don't think it's my medium of choice. I will attempt to blog once a week to see if I can keep up with it. Fair enough? O-K.

They're* coming to get you, Barbara

2010-02-26T05:59:00.000-08:00

*The internet.

The internet is giving me the fear. Not the often-clogged series of tubes (as best illustrated by a Windows 95 screensaver), but the virtual masses who are sharing the location of their homes, letting us know the exact moment they cross the bridge, and flooding my once pristine Twitter feed with instructions on how to find them.

Four Square has been active in our fair hamlet for a few months, now. It allows folks to "check in" to a location via an application or their mobile website. Checking in shares your current location with your pals on Four Square, and can also be synced with Facebook and Twitter.

I joined it a few days after I noticed an influx of tweets from locals using the tool (just in case it ended up being awesome, I wanted to brag that I was an early adopter). I puttered around with it on my iPod Touch, sharing when I was at a local comedy club or a great coffee shop, and proclaimed my arrival at work. A few weeks later, I quit the Four Square show and went back to living my life without giving up GPS coordinates.

Social media tools already require a certain level of narcissism. Your presence on these websites has to be worth following, so a little thought should be put into the content that you share. To assume that the whole world is interested in your exact location at any given moment is perhaps going a bit too far.

There's a reason someone like Ashton Kutcher is popular on Twitter, and it's not the quality of his writing or his profound ideas (or, as of late, his successful films). He is a celebrity, albeit a lame one, and sad-ish That 70s Show fans will always want to know what Kelso is up to, what he's eating, who he's talking to, and where he is in the world. Your average Nova Scotian, even those with a good number of followers, doesn't have the same draw. Kelso could get away with indulgently using Four Square. You can't. People want to know where he had lunch. No one wants to know the address of the Tim Horton's you get coffee from in the morning. The use of Four Square as a tool for special events or meeting up with friends has its merits, but it's honestly getting a little silly.

There's also the scarier side of constantly divulging your location. The website Please Rob Me lists "all those empty homes out there" based on Four Square updates on Twitter. You're also basically making an open invitations for people to move from following you online, to stalking you down your street. Take heed: this is coming from someone who once accidentally forwarded the address of her Dartmouth stronghold to 700 strangers on Facebook. You don't want the Internet showing up on your doorstep.

Recommended Viewing:
We Live in Public
Night of the Living Dead

Oscar Pool 2010: Internet Edition

2010-02-04T04:47:00.000-08:00

On Twitter the other day, I asked if folks would be interested in doing an Oscar pool, and got a pretty good response. After mulling about for the past few days, I've come up with the following terms for our little wager:

1. It's $10.00 to participate. Winner takes all. In the case of a tie, I'll come up with a very impartial tie-breaker. Update: The amazing folks at the Atlantic Film Festival are going to throw in a few screening passes! So cool.

2. You can drop $$$ off at my work (Public Archives Building at Dal), or arrange to meet up with me somewhere in Halifax/the wilds of Dartmouth. If you're interested in sending money through Paypal, DM me and I'll send you my address.

3. You have until the day before the Oscars to make your predictions. Here's a handy list to use. When you've made your choices, send me an email and confirm that these are your final picks. Oscar night, I'll print all of these off and keep score. I'll try to tweet through the night so you know who's in the lead.

4. Winner will get the cash, internet glory, and movie buff status.

5. Choose... wisely.

Confirmed Participants:

Moi
Andrew "Egon" Fleming
RyanMcNutt
TheCoolestCool *
NatalieJoan
Sue_Oz
HalifaxFilmGal
Joverm
Boostventilator

Lauren vs. Winter

2010-01-11T09:54:00.000-08:00

Worthwhile activities to combat the winter doldrums, also known as yes, it's Canada, but do try to leave your house.

January 20
Third Wednesday: Beer and new media chat--come say "hi"!

January 21
Thrillema: My one true love has returned, armed with a lawnmower. DEAD/ALIVE! In a less accessible part of Dartmouth, but I'm betting that won't hold back the crowds. An amazing short film, "Blood Shed", is playing as well. Pre-sale here.

January 23:
Canadians Against Proroguing Parliament: Halifax Rally. Kind of speaks for itself. 10:00 AM at Province House.

January 24:
Podcamp Halifax. Hang-outs, learning, and good times with social media folk.

January 26:
The amazing Ani Difranco is playing a show at the Cohn as part of the Dead of Winter festival.

January 29:
Tom Fun Orchestra and the Stanfields. Tom Fun are a must-see. The energy is like nothing else. Also, there's like 50 people crammed on stage.

January 30:
Bust a Move. Come watch gals from the internet attempt to get through 6-hours of exercise. This'll probably be your last chance to see me, as either exertion or Richard Simmons will do me in.

Retro Night. If I survive the exercise, I am going to get folks to wheelbarrow me over to the Paragon Theatre, where propped up in a corner I'll attempt to walk like an Egyptian.

February 5:
United Steelworkers of Montreal. Blue-collar alt-country from Quebec. The best.

Fast Forward

2010-01-05T05:33:00.000-08:00

I didn't do a "top ten" movies list for 2009, or the past decade, because I honestly couldn't commit to making a selection. Having no actual education in film, aside from a strange class that made me want to beat up Mike Leigh, I can only say what I liked... movies that I was excited to see and that held up to that build-up.

Now that we're into a new year, fresh with promise for film, I'd like to highlight a few films that have piqued my interest and gotten my hopes up for a fun year of movie-watching. Movies that haven't broken my heart, yet, with opening weekend dates that I'll pencil into my calendar.

Amer
Release date: 3 March

A Belgian film that seems to be a reinvention of the giallo film, popularized by directors like Dario Argento. The film is apparently mostly free of dialogue, and follows three stages in the life of a woman named Ana. We are shown her childhood, adolescence and adulthood, and in each time period, the most significant experience is that of being watched.

Shutter Island
Release date: 19 February

Martin Scorsese made a scary-looking movie. Drama is set in 1954, U.S. Marshal Teddy Daniels is investigating the disappearance of a murderess who escaped from a hospital for the criminally insane and is presumed to be hiding on the remote Shutter Island.

Inception
Release date: 16 July

Christopher Nolan is great. He made really cool movies like Memento, Insomnia, and Following. Then he directed two of the most lucrative movies of all time. Now he has really big budgets to work with. Enter, Inception. Corporations have developed a technology to enter dreams to extract information from certain peoples' heads. A CEO dreams and things begin to escalate, taking a turn for the worst. The trailer... just... wow. Love it.

Paul
Release date: "2010"

A comedy about two sci-fi geeks who embark upon a pilgrimage in a RV to the center of America's UFO heartland: Nevada's infamous Area 51. While in the middle of that desert, the two friends encounter a fugitive alien by the name of Paul.

I like the idea of this because Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are in it... and it sounds something like Spaced: the Movie. Directed by the guy who did Superbad, and he brought some of his friends with him.

Piranha 3D
Release date: 16 April

Every year the population of sleepy Lake Victoria explodes from 5,000 to 50,000 for a single, wild weekend - the 4th of July, a riot of sun, drunken fun and sex-crazed mayhem. This year however, a tremor has caused the lake’s floor to open, setting free scores of prehistoric piranhas… OH NO!

This movie sounds so fun. And it’s in 3-D. And Christopher Lloyd plays a piranha expert.

The Expendables
Release date: 20 August

After years of corruption, murder of American hostages, and betrayal of foreign policies, the US - with the help of other Nations who secretly put together a squad of their most highly trained military personal - will finally attempt to overthrow the dictator who has caused devastation in South America for over 20 years.

Who makes up this team? Why, EVERYONE who has ever been in an action movie (except for JCvD, who turned down a role). Even Governor Schwarzenegger makes a cameo. Written and Directed by Stallone, 'natch.

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
Release date: 27 August

Based on the great graphic novel series by the very talented Bryan Lee O'Malley (whose music is also great), Scott Pilgrim must defeat his new girlfriend's seven evil ex-boyfriends in order to win her heart. Rife with references to music, manga, and video games, this movie already makes me squee with nerd joy.

Iron Man II
Release date: 7 May

It won't be as good as Iron Man, but you'll still see it and swoon. OK, me too.

The Wolfman
Release date: 12 February

Great cast, classic plot, with a questionable director and worrying last-minute editing. I love the look of the trailer, and hope the film lives up to the iconic story.

Mother's Day
Release date: 9 May

Remake of the Troma classic, Mother’s Day sees sadistic members of a villainous family return to their childhood home to terrorize the new home owners and their guests. Jamie King and Rebecca De Mornay play the mothers of each family.

Splice
Release date: "2010"

Two geneticists combine human and animal DNA to create an entirely new being, which grows from deformity into a beautiful female. It bonds with its scientist-parents, Adrien Brody and Sarah Polley, but then things turn deadly. From the director of Cube, it's produced by the always wonderful Guillermo del Toro.

The Rum Diary
Release date: "2010"

I am kind of over Johnny Depp as a Tim Burton vehicle of "emo weird", but I loved his turn as the Good Doctor in Fear and Loathing, and appreciate his continual promotion of Hunter S. Thompson's work. This movie has been in pre-production for YEARS, so I'm pleased that it finally has a tentative 2010 release.

Depp plays Paul Kemp, Thompson's alias... a freelance journalist who finds himself at a critical turning point in his life while writing for a run-down newspaper in the Caribbean. Directed by Withnail and I's Bruce Robinson.

Movies of 2010

2010-01-03T10:57:00.001-08:00

Year 3 (1 & 2) of attempting to log every movie I watch. Cinematic self-improvement.

January
Up in the Air
Knowing
The Time Traveler's Wife
Old School
The Unborn
Troll 2
Blades of Glory
Nine
Oceans 13
Jennifer's Body
Cannibal Holocaust
Shake Hands With the Devil
The Bridge
The Duchess
Defiance
The Proposal
The Interpreter
My Name is Bruce
The Foot Fist Way
Daybreakers
The Young Victoria
Frailty
The Hurt Locker
La mariée était en noir
Quills
loudQUIETloud
Cronos
Dead/Alive
Blood Shed
Ink
Good Morning, Vietnam
Whip It

February
Pandora's Box
Survive Style 5+
Looking for Lulu
Crazy Heart
Manufacturing Consent
We Live in Public
Homicide
Marebito
Bright Star
War of the Roses
Shutter Island
Hunger
Days of Heaven
Surrogates

March
The Crazies
Coco Avant Chanel
Polytechnique
The Girlfriend Experience
My Best Fiend
Capitalism: A Love Story
Even Dwarfs Started Small
A Single Man
Precious
Passengers
Red Cliff
Everything is Illuminated
Man Bites Dog
Cadillac Records
Perfume: The Story of a Murderer
Bottle Shock
Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte
Brown Bunny
Troll 2
The Ghost Writer
Baby Mama
Elizabeth: The Golden Age
The Holiday
Brokeback Mountain
Mirrors

April
2001: A Space Odyssey
Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging
Brothers
Valentino: The Last Emperor
Ghost
An Education
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
Hackers
Hollywoodland
Ghost Town
Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist
Fur
Reel Injun
The Runaways
A Town Called Panic
The International
Hobo
Shellshock Rock
The Lovely Bones
The Cove
The Men Who Stare at Goats
The Break Up
The Room
The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
Art & Copy
This Is It

May
The Yes Men Fix the World
Boondock Saints II: Awful, just Awful
Visioneers
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
How to Get Ahead in Advertising
Iron Man II
Document of the Dead
Forgetting Sarah Marshall
Session 9
Night of the Creeps
Mac and Me
Sex and the City 2: Awful

June
Poughkeepsie Tapes
Cape Fear
Splice
---
112

Television:

Long Way Round
The Wire
Big Love
Long Way Down
Eastbound and Down

It's here...

2009-12-18T06:04:00.000-08:00

SANTA LIVES!

Overlit at parts and nonsensical, but I still like it.

SANTA LIVES!

2009-12-14T06:28:00.001-08:00

1. My movie list has edged its way past 200. This is OK. Next year will be better.

2. Andrew and I put our diseased brains together to create a weird little 8mm film for the AFCOOP Super-8 Handmade Holiday Screening.

It may be overlit and not in focus... and even if it's not, it will still make zero sense. The premise is that Penhorn Mall, beloved by many (I mourn the loss of its movie theatre), is about to be torn down. The mall Santa, a rather creepy chap, vows to never leave its hallowed halls. The mall is torn down, and the Santa is killed.

Mysteriously, the Santa's body goes missing, and his mad scientist son has sworn revenge. What could possible happen next...!?!?

Filmed in my kitchen and on the lovely Dartmouth waterfront, at the very least the project afforded me a weekend of fun, throwing around fake blood and pointing kitchen knives menacingly at Halifax. Joy to the world.

The Werewolf 10 for (un)Death-Match

2009-11-26T04:48:00.001-08:00

[I'm vouching for werewolves for the moment, until vampires become good and creepy again. You can throw your support towards either side at (un)Death-Match.]

Twilight has made a bold attempt to turn vampires into wimps, and with that mopey sequel in theatres, werewolves are getting the pre-teen treatment, too. Alas. I fear for the youth of today.

For your benefit, here are some facts you should know about werewolves:

1. A werewolf would eat you.
2. A werewolf doesn't care about your feelings.
3. A werewolf won't hold your hand while you cry.
4. Lon Chaney Jr. > Taylor Lautner times ONE MILLION.
5. Benecio Del Toro > Taylor Lautner... and I haven't seen The Wolf Man remake, yet! My assumption is based off of the ridiculous poster. See:

BAD ASS.

If you agree with the statements above... then read on! Here are a few of my favourite werewolves in television and film.

1. An American Werewolf in London
We have many things to thank John Landis for (and a few things to loath him for). My personal favourite of his is An American Werewolf in London, which successfully merges horror and comedy to create a really fun film. Two American backpackers are travelling around the UK when they're attached by a mysterious beast. Don't go out to the moors at night, OK?

2. Ginger Snaps
Growing up sucks! Two creepy sisters, Ginger and Bridgitte, are having fun being morbid and stuff when A) Ginger gets her period for the first time and B) Is subsequently bitten by a werewolf. Isn't puberty the worst? As Ginger gets scarier and scarier, her sister tries to find a way to cure her. Awesome Canadian film!

3. The Wolf Man
This film is like the Holy Bible of werewolf flicks. It introduced the notion that a silver bullet can kill a werewolf, that they are forced to change under a full moon, and that they are supposedly marked with a pentagram. Lon Chaney Jr. portrays a man who goes to visit his ancestral home when he is attacked by a werewolf. His performance in this film is chock full of guilt and torment, leaving the audience more sympathetic than scared. The make-up in this movie is ridiculous, especially when you account for it being 1941 and all.

4. The Howling
Joe Dante, I love you! Please do a sequel to The 'burbs. Another great 1980s werewolf movie. A TV news anchor heads to a commune-esque clinic to take a break after being traumatized by a serial killer. Fun party, right? NOPE. Straaaaaaange things happen once she arrives. What she doesn't know is that there is a "den" of werewolves nearby... dun dun DUNNNN.

5. Wolfen
OK, so they're not really werewolves... just really smart wolves who decide they're hungry for MAN FLESH. Features kind of heavy-handed social commentary and views of urban decay in New York City. If that doesn't interest you, your boyfriend Edward James Olmos is in it.

6. Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Seth Green plays an introspective teenager named Oz who plays lead guitar in Dingos Ate My Baby and turns into a werewolf every once in a while. By dating Willow the witch, he becomes part of the Scooby Gang until things go decidedly bad and he leaves town. Oz is mostly well behaved and only occasionally eats people.

7. The Hilarious House of Frightenstein
This amazing 1970s Canadian kids show had a cast of creepy characters, but The Wolfman stood out for me as being the best. The guy has a bunch of things going for him... he's a DJ, he gets to listen to Sly and the Family Stone all day, sports a fashionable beard, and has excellent dance parties with Igor. Lucky.

8. Werewolves on Wheels
A biker gang smashes up the monastery of some Satan-worshipping monks. OH NO! But the monks have a trick up their sleeve, as they have turned one of the biker chicks into a werewolf via their evil powers... with dire results, mwahahha.

9. Teen Wolf and Teen Wolf Too
Michael J. Fox is an average guy, but then he turns into a werewolf and is a BASKETBALL STAR and A TOTAL STUD. But what he wants most is to be normal. Sigh.
Jason Bateman stars in the so-bad-it's-kinda-good sequel with basically the same plot. Except he's in college. And the sport is boxing. OK.

10. Dog Soldiers
British soldiers are on a training operation in Scotland, which, unfortunately, is overrun with werewolves. And the full moon is rising. Well, darn it. The soldiers fight for their lives as they attempt to live through the night. A pretty tense movie with lots of jumpy moments.

Bright lights... bright lights!

2009-11-17T09:11:00.000-08:00

Through the use of magic powers and an afternoon spent wandering around Google Wave, I have successfully combined a cool fundraiser, the Internets, and the 1980s.

1. The cool fundraiser is Bust a Move, which is raising money for new digital mammography equipment for local hospials.
2. The internets are being represented by these ladies.
3. The 1980s make an appearance in the form of...

GREMLINS!!!!! YES!!!!! YES!!!!

Re-experience the movie that you both feared and loved as a child! Ignore the fact that Howie Mandel is involved! Rejoice as Corey Feldman says and does awesome things!

The movie will be screened at the Public Archives Building on December 16th at 7:00 PM. Come one, come all. Awesome retro attire encouraged. Someone please invite Joe Dante.

Bonfires burning bright, pumpkin faces in the night...

2009-11-04T04:44:00.000-08:00

Halloween was almost a disaster. During some kind of strange musical theatre fit, I decided that I would purchase a giant orange wig and maid's uniform and go as Magenta from The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Magenta and I have a lot in common... the overuse of eye make-up, the weird friends, and her secret double-life as an alien all come to mind.

Two days before Halloween the eBay seller that I had ordered said items from mysteriously canceled our transaction. What for? The package they sent had come back to them damaged, and I was out of luck. Eff you, eBay.

I knew I still wanted to be someone from a movie, and preferably a horror movie. Women in horror movies don't tend to have quite as much luck as men, and definitely don't have the iconic costumes of say, Jason, Freddy, or Michael Myers. I toyed briefly with the idea of going as Carrie, but figured that was an outdoor sort of costume, and I didn't want to ruin anyone's furniture (or wash fake blood out of my hair).

I ended up with the idea of a classic movie dame, Janet Leigh, as she appears in the movie Psycho. Leigh plays Marion Crane, who, in one of the most famous scenes ever in film, is stabbed to death in the shower.

This was more of a Psycho-themed costume (vs. a straight Janet Leigh get-up), as I didn't have the time to find a proper wig... if I was going to replicate her look I would also have done something to look wet. Maybe would have sported a towel. Who knows.

So, for my costume I purchases a few shower curtains from the dollar store. I laid them flat on the floor and covered them in heathy dollops of fake blood (also from the dollar store--less thick and sticky than homemade). I allowed the blood to dry for a bit before folding the curtains in half and sealing the edges with tape. This allowed for the liquid to move around in a Rorschach-y kind of way.

My wig, also from the dollar store, was pretty ghetto. The colour was awful, but that's what you get two days before Halloween. I hacked it up so it was fairly short, but couldn't take a lot off as my real hair would have shown too much.

Underneath the bloody mess I sported a nude-coloured mini-dress from American Apparel and some nude tights. I taped the shower curtains into an odd dress, threw on some make-up and more fake-blood, and voila... a costume that no one was able to recognize, but at least I thought it was cool.

(Andrew was a convincing Einstein.)

Over the course of the night it was suggested that I was Lady Gaga, Laura Palmer (awesome, actually), and Marilyn Monroe. Next year I may try to be something more clearly identifiable, but hey, for two days I think I did OK. Onto next year...

Things That Are True

2009-10-22T10:36:00.000-07:00

1. Concert tickets are expensive

I have given chunks of my salary to Slayer (yes), Megadeth (awesome), Stone Temple Pilots (admittedly a little lame but WHATEVER, internet), and Aussie Pink Floyd Show (for the fourth time). Still speculating whether I'll make an appearance the English Beat show. Or get smuggled into Wilco. Time will tell.

2. Nocturne was awesome

This was a blast! I wish I was able to see more, but what I did check out was the most fun. Major highlight: lots of free apple cider. Somehow ended up hanging out on top of another downtown Halifax building as a closer to the evening. Made other "roof crawlers" nervous.

3. I like Halloween

Forsaking my zombie heritage and box of spirit gum, dermawax, and blood gel, my Halloween costume will be gore free. The experience of picking prosthetics off of my face after the Zombie Walk was an unhappy one. Unlike the undead, I need my skin firmly attached to my body. My 2009 costume involves a big red wig and a black dress. All shall be revealed.

4. The internet is fun

I'm blogging at the new Spacing Atlantic website in a feature called From the Vaults. So far I've talked about the Capitol Theatre and the Halifax Memorial Library. Looking forward to sharing fun photos and stories about Nova Scotian landmarks.

5. Borscht is delicious

Andrew is making a hearty meal for the Russian party he's having on Friday. There will be great music and good people. Hopefully the awesome furry hat from the last Russian party makes an appearance, along with many bottles of vodka.

6. Planning trips is great

Europe 2: Electric Boogaloo might happen next fall. This trip centers on Germany during Oktoberfest, with train rides to Switzerland and Belgium. Fingers crossed. I still haven't visited my favourite city, Prague, but I think that will have to be another trip.

7. I am learning a lot about film

And will be learning a lot more once this work project really starts rolling. Right now I'm getting the basics on care and handling of film, and its preservation. I'm also getting to know the archives' film holdings quite a bit. Nerd glee.

8. Dartmouth is the best

...but the youth that hang around my street look like they want to beat me up and steal my lunch money. They would use that lunch money to get extra large slices of pepperoni pizza at Uncle Buck's on Pleasant St. They would then go to the Ultramar for chips. I'm watching them carefully...

Bust a Move!

2009-10-20T05:44:00.000-07:00

Usually I just like to give a bit of money to charity events, but this one seemed a bit different.

To raise money for leading-edge digital mammography equipment for local hospitals, myself and 1000 other people are going to exercise for six hours at the Metro Centre on January 10th. This exercise extravaganza is called Bust a Movie, and is going to feature a celebrity fitness instructor... I won't say who, but he was featured in one of my all-time favourite Whose Line is it Anyways skits.

I'm doing this with a team of ladies affectionately known at the HalifaxChicks. We've each been tasked with raising $1000. Many women in my family have been affected by breast cancer, and some have lost their lives, so this means a lot to me. If you can give just a few dollars, it will bring me one step closer to reaching my goal. You can donate online or in person, so let me know if you're not comfortable using the website. I've added a Paypal button below, so if you want to give that way you can.

Thanks so much for your support... here's hoping I can reach my goal!

Lauren

PS--The exercise aspect of this seems like TORTURE and I will likely be in the ultra-beginner section. Crying. Eeek.

Atlantic Film Festival Review: The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

2009-09-23T06:28:00.000-07:00

"Can you put a price on your dreams?"

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus has already gone down in history as being Heath Ledger's last film. I expect that it will have a much wider audience because of this, and I'm happy that many will get to experience this adventure.

It just might be Terry Gilliam's masterpiece, filled with spectacle and layers of meaning. The CGI in this movie is fantastic, and never cartoony (my issue with the upcoming Alice in Wonderland film, which tries for weird and ends up looking boring). The traveling show of Doctor Parnassus provides the backdrop for the journey out of the real world (modern day London, filled with crumbling buildings) and into the imagination.

Every thing about this film seems to have come from a children's story book. Colour drenches the film when things are good, and when things take a turn for the worse, we find ourselves in a barren wasteland or endless snow-covered field. The archetypal characters play roles we've seen in many a fairy tale. The old man, powerful but not especially wise. His beautiful daughter, desired by many. A mysterious stranger with a dark past. And, of course, the bad guy... in this case, the Devil.

The story told by the film is not the strongest, but it does not diminish the wonder you feel being pulled into the world of the imagination. It reads as Doctor Faustus meets (fittingly) the Brothers Grimm. The immortal Doctor Parnassus (Christopher Plummer) has made a wager with the Devil (Tom Waits), and he has come to collect. The prize is Parnassus' daughter, the beautiful Valentina (Lily Cole). When Parnassus is given one more chance to save his daughter, the stranger Tony (Heath Ledger) enters their lives and changes everything.

Although there are a few scenes made mighty uncomfortable by the thought of Ledger's passing hanging over head, this is a good role for him to be remembered by. The darkness of the Joker is forgotten, and replaced by a charming but deeply flawed man who makes us laugh while trying to get away with it all.

While Ledger is the most talked-about actor in this production, Plummer is the true star, though it may not be apparent until the film is over and you realize its his story we've been told. He is both majestic and broken, and plays a convincing drunk.

Tom Waits, in a role he has been rehearsing for decades, I imagine, is outright perfect as Mr. Nick--the Devil. Mr. Nick is dressed to the nines, pencil mustache included, and hides in the shadows when he isn't taunting Parnassus. He had the audience absolutely shaking with laughter, and by all means should take this character to the studio and pen Songs of Mr. Nick: The Devil Made Me Do It.

In one of her first acting roles, Lily Cole flexes her supermodel legs in lovely, flowing costumes. Her surreal features fit into the bigger-than-life scenery like she was simply plucked from Gilliam's brain. Apparently she has been cast to play Alice in Marilyn Manson's movie about Lewis Carroll, Phantasmagoria (Manson plays the titular character)... alas, stay away from that guy, young lady.

The three actors who reprise Ledger's role while in the imagination do quite a good job, and Gilliam has made them fit into the story quite naturally. Johnny Depp was a little annoying as he slipped into his typical Burton-film speech, but I very much enjoyed Jude Law and Colin Farrell who had more subtle performances.

When the film slows to a close, many may be confounded by the story. But as someone close to me said, "[Parnassus] is atmospherically mind-blowing, but plot-wise a little meandering." You are taken for a ride somewhere, but the conclusion is fuzzy, because really, it doesn't matter. The experience in this movie is driven mostly by the eye, and dare I say, the heart. Let your brain sit this one out... it'll just get strained, anyways.

Atlantic Film Festival Review: Act of God

2009-09-21T05:56:00.000-07:00

I'm a handful of movies and two parties into the Atlantic Film Festival and am starting to feel the strain of the late nights. I'm seeing a movie every night this week and two in a row on Friday. I'm making very good use of my bus pass and am getting over my "seeing movies alone" stigma. Bueno.

In partnership with ReelNinja.com, I'm scrawling down a few reviews. I'm not the most competent reviewer, but I do like movies a lot and spend a lot of time watching them. First up, Act of God. Look for a review of The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus coming soon...

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"I can't accept that it happened for a reason, nor can I really accept that there is no reason. The only way to carry on is to be humble, and a little bit in awe of these things you can't really understand."

Act of God is the newest film from director Jennifer Baichwal, best known for her 2006 film Manufactured Landscapes. It is film about how people cope with being on the receiving end of something so powerful and out of their control. Lightening plays the deus ex machina and comes down from the sky to irreversibly change a person's life. Broken, they must struggle to reform their understanding of the universe.

Through interviews with those struck by lightening, those who had close calls, and others who lost family members, Act of God explores how these people deal with an event that is so rare, and traces back the events in their lives that brought them to the lightening. A constant theme throughout the movie is the subjects' thoughts on why they were struck; was it their fate or a completely random event? Not surprisingly, many take comfort in either possibility... that they were chosen by God, or on the contrary, that it means nothing.

The film includes some beautiful images and film clips of lightening storms, many of which seem to be lifted from YouTube. The progression of the film, like perhaps its subject, is very random. It is not a scientific exploration of this violent event in nature, but a deeply personal journey about those who have been changed forever in a two-second strike.

The metaphysical exploration of lightening strikes also leads into a discussion of electricity in the human brain, and how randomness changes the way our brain works. This is illustrated by a man whose brain waves are being observed on a computer while he plays an improvised guitar solo that is inspired by lightening.

Act of God contains powerful moments, but it loses strength in the selection of material and the jerky progression of the film. Segments stick out as being too loosely connected to the subject matter, when the film would have benefited from a more focused story. The film as a whole shows humanity's fear and awe of nature, but sometimes ignores its subject, lightening, and the clear science behind it.

I heard a few people on the way out muttering that they thought it was supposed to be a film about lightening. Besides the clips of storms, the subject really could have been just about anything... a hurricane, a plane crash, a drive-by shooting... any event that relinquishes our control and throws us to the mercy of the universe.

730 Days

2009-08-21T06:21:00.001-07:00

Fall is almost here. It's hard to believe that two years ago I was finishing up with university and nervously approaching the start of my first post-grad job.

I have enjoyed my time in the Post Secondary Internship Program, though, believe me, although I was here as an intern I definitely wasn't treated like one (in a good way). I have been able to work on great projects and assume responsibility for a number of different initiatives that have helped to promote the great work that happens at the provincial archives, both within government and to the public.

Yesterday an announcement went around to staff that they're going to be stuck with me a while longer. I'm still going to be the new media gal and will continue to support the division's communications efforts, but I get to sink my teeth into an amazing project that puts me more on the archival side of things.

Until April of next year I'm going to be working on a project called The Way We Were: Nova Scotia in Film, 1917 - 1957. My job will be to oversee the digitization of 60,000* feet of film, the creation of a virtual cinema on our website, and the maintenance of a YouTube channel. There are lots of other details, but what it breaks down to is that I'm going to get to watch and edit hours and hours of film and get paid to do it. I am pleased.

All in all, things are good. I'm enjoying my time at the little purple house in Dartmouth and am finding more excuses to douse myself in fake blood. A self-improvement challenge will be to motivate myself to get out and enjoy an after work class or volunteer project vs. buying box-sets, playing hermit, and building Facebook farms:

But as you can see, at least I'm rolling in the mad cash-money and have my very own pony, who I am apparently raising for its meat. I guess that's my Dutch side coming through.

*60,000 feet = crossing the Macdonald Bridge 18 times.

Things I Bought That I Love

2009-07-31T04:55:00.000-07:00

I am enamoured with Mindy Kaling and wish that she would update her blog more often, so I can look with envy at her cute Marc Jacobs tees and Betsey Johnson jewelry. Sadly, it seems as though she is busy being fabulous and I will have to do with her equally awesome tweets.

For the past little while I've been amassing some fun (read: cheap) purchases and decided that I should share them with internet-town.

1980s Tall "Pirate" Boots from Etsy

A cross between Van Helsing, J. Depp, and Kate Moss. The top folds over if you want them to look slouchy.

Flower Print Babydoll Top from Etsy
From Pretty Raccoon, who was one of my first eBay purchases many moons ago. I like the vintage looking flower print v. much.

Woochie® "Spoiled Rotten" Prosthetic from eBay
The same people who helped make my Terminator costume so successful. The maggots are a nice touch. This shall be worn at the Zombie Walk on August 15th.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer seasons 2 and 3 from Amazon
My second-favourite television show of my youth. I always considered the first three seasons to be amazing, but it's always rough when your characters finish high school. The graduation episodes are near perfect. It should be noted that I don't want cable TV, and my local movie store (read: some guy's house) is a little sketchy (read: smokes pot in the store at 3 in the afternoon). Hence, boxsets rule.

Joel Plaskett's Three from NOT THE INTERNET
Especially good for road-trips, because, like a highway, it goes on and on...

Lunch from John's Lunch
Greasy, amazing diner food. With lots of ketchup and tartar sauce. Just down the street from my house and across the road from the new HUGE Value Village. Jealous??

Lastly, I am very thankful that I get to attend my lovely friend Jill's wedding in Ottawa, as well as being able to see Montreal for a few days. I was able to get tickets on sale from Westjet for under $200 (return), which was an amazing deal. Stuff is all well and good, but it's the experiences that count.

Got up this Mornin'

2009-07-09T05:40:00.000-07:00

The past few weeks have gone by in a blur, and I'm tempted to skip recounting my trip to Toronto, but will instead give up some jot notes.

The city is crazy. I don't like crowds of teenagers. I'm jealous of their public transportation system. I wish we had a Sephora here. The weather was awful. The people were rude. I had a great time hanging with two good friends. I wish we had a weird hippie village that extended further than the Black Market.

Oh yes, and I love roller coasters:

Heh heh heh

When I returned back east I was greeted by three weeks of bad weather and an impending move that hurt my head. A bunch of broken stuff and a wad of cash later, I bid a sad farewell to my apartment of two years, a mere five minute walk from downtown. It caused me a lot of stress, with appliances breaking, the wind rushing in during winter, and a few mice (the folks downstairs swear they saw rats), but I will miss it.

I'm Littlest Hobo-ing it by staying with a friend until the lady whose house I'm going to be looking after flies off to Greece on the 18th (all together now--jealous!). So my Hali-ventures continue for a little while longer.

Virgin Festival was great, dirty fun. I ruined a pair of shoes, got splattered in mud, and had unfortunate run-ins with drunk, shirtless, sweaty guys... the worst type of concert-goer. I enjoyed just about everyone who played, but especially got a kick out of seeing Dinosaur Jr., Hey Rosetta!, and the Handsome Furs. The Offspring were a lot of fun in a weird, nostalgic way... I used to love Smash back in the day and may have gotten a little excited when they played "Come Out and Play" and "Self Esteem".

Offspring! Before I got punched a lot and moved back from the front.

This Saturday is "stand outside the Commons and listen to Macca for free" day. It's also filled with Jazz Fest goodness (side note: Sa-ba-da-OW!). I'm checking out Verbal Warnin' at the festival tent and most likely skipping Retro Night for some Pixies goodness at the Seahorse.

Sunday is... drumroll... Twitter Rafters! My organizational skills have been put to good work. I think it's going to be a great day. Day trips are lovely, especially when complemented with friends and activities that are potentially detrimental to your well-being (I have waivers for us to sign). Goodness.

6 months, 120 movies

2009-06-17T06:32:00.000-07:00

This is my second year of attempting to log all of the movies I watch. It's harder than it sounds, and I am not sure if the mid-year total 120 is 100% accurate, but it's definitely better than last year's score of 140/12 months. I don't think I'm watching more movies, but I am more diligent about updating my list.

It has been six months of highs and lows. I started off strong with a roster of Paul Verhoeven and a few other Dutch films, and made an attempt to watch the majority of Oscar-nominated movies for that year.

February was mostly a month of cheesy horror and sci-fi, with a healthy dose of Jean Claude Van Damme. I believe Valentine's Day was spent watching Total Recall and either Bloodsport or Kickboxer. Romance is still alive and well.

I don't understand what was going on with me in March. There's no theme. It's Rock n Roll High School 2 followed by Network. The one weird Saturday where I watched Mad Max I and II and probably almost died. A little bit of David Cronenberg and a sparked interest in Bruce McDonald. Alrighty.

Every single movie I watched in April was completely awesome in its own way. Except for The Haunting in Connecticut. And How To Lose Friends and Alienate People. With apologies to Simon Pegg. Obvious winners of April include Straw Dogs, Heat, Gone With the Wind, and Vertigo. The award for "most hilarious movie featuring creepy incest" goes to Flowers in the Attic--well done, V.C. Andrews!

May was chock full of bad VHS and movies that I would never have rented/downloaded that were on TV. I watched Star Trek and The Fall twice. I subjected myself to a Donnie Darko spin-off. Aging myself about 25 years, I complained about the noisy teenagers during the opening night of Drag Me To Hell and got free movie tickets.

This summer will bring a good selection for the alFresco filmFesto (including one of my all-time favourites Harold and Maude) and, if I'm lucky, involvement in a few short films, including one I'm in the process of writing. I'll be needing extras with a strong stomach who can stand a little (or a lot) of fake blood and dermawax, and a willingness to hang out with me in Woodside. You have been warned.

East Coast Throw Down

2009-06-05T06:13:00.000-07:00

Classified feat. Joel Plaskett

vs.

Matt Mays feat. Buck 65

Matt may have the upper hand... he's got Bruce Frisko in his corner.

902/416

2009-06-03T06:28:00.001-07:00

I'm moving in less than a month, and have been pretty good about getting things packed away and making arrangements to get my stuff outta Halifax. Moving is the worst, but I'm getting some enjoyment out of sorting through all of my things and dreaming of my new place, which comes equipped with a real-life washer and dryer (it has been nearly TWO YEARS of carting my laundry to friends/family... I hate laundromats) and an Arabian Nights room (more on this later).

Before I get the heck out of the South End, I'm going to have to pack for another purpose--a trip to the T-dot-Ohh (Ohhh!) to visit mein friend, Josh, at the end of the month. We've got awful and wonderful things planned, like descending upon MuchMusic like the 13-year olds we are and verbally abusing the Jonas Bros and Lady GaGa. Good times. It will be my first visit to the fair hamlet of Torontonia, so I expect I'll be floored by the big buildings and what-not... edifices too controversial for Halifax.

Not that Halifax isn't cool beans. Lately I've been provided with many an awesome night out, in the form of Cirque de Soleil's Alegria (inspiring, amazing, and for me, terrifying), Joel Plaskett's Rebecca Cohn show (fantastic), and a lovely little film called DRAG ME TO HELL (so fun).

A neat opportunity that's coming up next weekend is the once-a-year opening of Georges Island. For around $15 you can take the ferry over and explore the ruins of Fort Charlotte and check out a very unique view of Halifax. Next weekend is also the much-beloved Greek Fest down on Purcell's Cove Road. This is where I go (almost) every year to eat way too much and yet always manage to sneak an extra piece of baklava. It's $5 for a weekend pass--whadda steal.

On the VHS adventures front, I've been awful and re-watched Titanic and Devil Wears Prada instead of The Dentist or every single Highlander movie. Another let-down was the waste of time that was Terminator: Salvation, which was the least fun movie I've seen in a long time (and I JUST watched Tetsuo: The Iron Man aka LIFE RUINER). SHAME on you, McG, SHAME! Please redeem yourself by giving Crispin Glover more Charlie's Angels cash. The man needs to make more movies! And come back to Halifax. And give me a tour of his castle in the Czech Republic. Just sayin'.

On a positive note, I'm getting Romero's Martin in a few days, and I'm fairly certain it's going to be great. Coming along with said movie is a book on how to make special fx gore on a budget. Time to raid Sobey's for some corn syrup, coffee grinds, and food colouring. I'm helping out with make-up for a short film that should be a lot of fun. Hopefully in the next few weeks I'll have some photos to share. If not, stay tuned for the Zombie Walk in August... I've got plans...

Disconnected and it feels so good

2009-05-19T10:47:00.000-07:00

I have long suspected that my cat hated my laptop... probably because I pay attention to it when I should be showering her with attention/treats (mostly treats). This laptop has been scratched, slept on, clogged with fur, and generally abused by my cat for many months. I had my suspicions, but I didn't know how far she'd go.

Last Friday must've been her last stand against technology, as when my boyfriend stopped by my place to check the internets, he discovered that the laptop's screen was, basically, cracked in two. The culprits? Likely a combination of cat and gravity.

This is pretty much what my screen looks like now:

I can see things on one corner of the screen, and at a moment of desperation managed to check my email/Twitter on a teeny-tiny Firefox and squint at mini-Facebook, but it's really not worth it. El laptoppo is dead, RIP.

Not having the internet to contain my attention led to some good things and some bad things.

Good: I made it out to the K-os show and really enjoyed myself. The opening band, Lioness, was a lot of fun. I will be inviting them to future Dance Parties via their sweet self-titled album. K-os was pretty fantastic, as predicted. I coveted his outfit and his ability to perform high kicks. Let it be known that "Crucial" and "ELEctrik HeaT - the seekwiLL" are my jams.

This weekend marked this guy and I's fourth anniversary, and we celebrated by going on an epic antiquing excursion, followed by martinis and Star Trek (lovelovelove). Despite my initial excitement over both Wolverine and Terminator: Salvation, I think Star Trek might win the nerd war, due to an unfair advantage: it has SPOCK.

One last good: Drag Me to Hell looks kind of awesome.

Bad: I watched 11 movies this long weekend and I will never get that time back.

Snow Angels : Dartmouth and Halifax lookin' pretty sad. But a good movie, nonetheless.
Taken : Liam Neeson kills everyone in Paris and gets away with it.
A Night to Remember : Also pretty good.
Star Trek : LOVE LOVE LOVE.
Re-Animator : "You killed him!" / "No, I did not. I gave him LIFE!"
Children of the Living Dead : Tom Savini kills zombies and it's funny for a bit, but then proceeds to ruin your life.
Wolfen : Fell asleep...
April Fool's Day : Kind of enjoyable (cheese) but mostly lame. Didn't like the rip-off ending.
Tetsuo: The Iron Man : Very cool, but may have ruined my life forever.
Storytelling : Very good.
Candyman : Need to watch sequels.

This week has considerable less time allotted to hermit-ing. Third Wednesday is this week at the Foggy Goggle from 5 to 7 PM---please come out and say "hi"! We'll be discussing how Nova Scotia election candidates are/aren't using social media.

I'll be checking out the Terminator premiere this Thursday. I may have harsh words for this "McG" character once its over. Usually a friend of Crispin Glover's is a friend of mine, but I may have to make an exception...

Vamos

2009-05-08T04:35:00.000-07:00

Internet,

There are a few things we need to talk about.

1. Che part one and two are currently playing at the Oxford, with back-to-back showings. That's 257 minutes of Benicio's scraggly beard. I don't tend to enjoy Steven Soderbergh's movies that much , but these two sound better than solid. A poster on the outside of the Oxford tells me that Public Enemies is coming soon. Johnny Depp is a notorious bank robber and G-man Christian Bale is going to take that sucker down. This is coming from the writer and director of Heat, my favourite "cops and robbers" movie, so I expect good things.

2. The last Dartmouth Thrillema was good fun, and a little bittersweet (there's a few photos up on my Flickr). Empire 6 is now offically closed, after almost 20 years of entertaining the good folks of Dartmouth. I had a lot of fun at that movie theatre. I laughed, I cried, I threw handful of Fuzzy Peaches across the aisle at the annoying girls from school. RIP Empire 6, and F-U Dartmouth Crossing.

3. One of my favourite bands (of high school) might be coming to Halifax with the now-confirmed Virgin Festival. The rumoured line-up is: Stone Temple Pilots (yay!), The Tragically Hip (ok!), The Offspring (what?), and Matt Mays (does El Torpedo exist anymore?). I predict that if this is the real line-up, concert-goers will be extreme jerks. Myself include. Look out.

4. Wolverine, Star Trek, and Terminator: Salvation all premiering within the same month is too much for little nerd heart. I've already seen the admittedly-lame Wolverine twice. Not good.

5. My adventures in VHS haven't been progressing very quickly, but I've managed to sneak in a few good movies. Out of the lot, one of the best has to be Straw Dogs. It's one of the strongest films I've seen in a while, resting on a rising wave of tension that explodes into gruesome violence (I think Kevin from Home Alone studied this movie well). Hard to believe this came out in 1971,

6. I will be re-appraising Retro Night at the Paragon Theatre this weekend. They got rid of the ridiculous mandatory coat-check that was bringing everyone down last time... smart move. Enjoy your weekend, folks

A Tracklist of Waste and Despair

2009-04-21T10:01:00.000-07:00

Such are the activities of the unsavoury and obstinate creep! Items such as "have more nightmares about Bette Davis" and "acquire more VHS" have been solidly realized, while actions like "pack away your apartment" and "cut your hair, you be-mulleted goon" remain unmet. ("Woe!" -- J. Lawrence)

I usually fall in and out of love with Halifax on a weekly basis, but the past little while has been good, in terms of occupying my time and keeping me from constantly wondering: Barney and Robin... WILL THEY OR WON'T THEY?!

In typical Lauren-fashion, here is what should have been several blog entries, condensed into one paltry bulleted list:

*International Record Store Day was last Saturday, and I was lucky enough to spend it at Taz Records, which was stuffed to the gills with bike ridin', scarf wearin', greasy hair'ed locals. We were treated to tunes by the fantastic Tom Fun Orchestra and the always charming Joel Plaskett who debuted a few songs from his new record, Three. In the spirit of Record Store Day, I looked through a weird assortment of vinyl and ended up leaving with four soundtracks: Ghostbusters, Lost Boys, The Cincinatti Kid, and Manhatten. Expect future dance-parties to come of this. Yeeeaaaah, Gershwin!

*Retro Night returned to the Marquee... I mean the Paragon Theatre... whatever. This has always been my favourite "dance night" in Halifax, but I am a little peeved at the way the "new" building looks and added "policies" like the $2 mandatory coat-check are a little lame. The main floor has been divided in two, leaving much less space for patrons. More than one person I invited ended up getting turned away quite early because the club was at capacity. I'll still be going to Retro Nights, and I am glad that the Paragon is bringing in great acts like Tom Fun, Hey Rosetta!, and Elliot Brood, but I'm definitely not getting in line to buy a "star pass".

*Thrillema in Dartmouth will be no more after next week. Sigh. I am pretty sad about that, as, if you haven't guessed already, I hail from the Darkside, and enjoyed seeing fun movies in the theatre I frequented for many, many years. The last Dartmouth Thrillema screening will be Conan the "Dartmouthian" Thursday at 9:00 PM. Last week's showing of Jurassic Park sold out at 7:45 pm due to huge pre-sales and weirdos like me showing up an hour+ early. My fake Sam Jackson arm and raptor shirt did not garner me a prize, but I had an alright time just the same. One thing that bothered me, slightly, was the loud mocking of the movie some people engaged in. I mean, I get that with some movies which are now seen as corny, or are purposefully campy, but, for me, Jurassic Park is a solid movie that deserves some respect. Yes, Lex was dumb for turning on the flashlight, but IT IS A MOVIE and not real life, so try and enjoy it instead of offering your method of avoiding T-Rex attacks to the entire theatre. Also, you know, SIR Richard Attenborough. RESPECT.

*People are beginning to not give me the side-eye when I mention Twitter. 'Cause, you know, if Oprah's doing it, it can't be that weird. Tweet-ups have been very fun, and I'm very pleased with the encouragement that I've received regarding my feeble attempts at conquering the interwebs with 140 characters. Upcoming events include one that I can help but think I inspired: '80s Games Night! Complete with a screening of the epic film THE WIZARD and maybe-if-they'll-let-me BRAINSCAN ('90s, but with Furlong and a "killer" CD-ROM, can you lose?). Be warned: my scrunchies will be EXTRA scrunched, my colour palate with be neon and glitter, and I have three pairs of Wayfarers waiting for me at home. Don't switch the blade on a guy in shades, oh-no!

Yes, it's all fun and games until someone gives you a box of VHS and you must hermit like a pro to get through them. As my movie list for the year grows steadily and I begin to forget the outside world in favour of watching Flowers in the Attic on repeat, I cannot help but be concerned. And then there goes my blog-fodder, unless this becomes a "secret diary" for Kristy Swanson and her weirdo closet family. Unfollow while you can!

Shut Up or Die!

2009-03-23T06:35:00.001-07:00

This is a brief message from your friendly neighbourhood movie geek: GO SEE PONTYPOOL!

It is so rare to come across movie that I believe will satisfy so many different age groups and different types of film fans. I am hesitant to call this a horror movie... I would rather lay it somewhere between suspense and drama, with elements of the horror genre thrown in. Unlike most scary movies, the acting chops of the lead actor are extremely formidable. I found myself being almost hypnotized by his voice, and became frightened when he was frightened, laughed when he laughed.

Pontypool is rolled out like a radio play, with emphasis on the audience using their minds to imagine the situations that are being described. This is a movie about "zombies" (sort of), but blood and gore do not really come into play that often. For the majority of the film, the "zombies" only appear in your mind as you must picture what the radio host is describing without any visual cue. Another word I would use to describe this movie is "smart"... it comes off as an intelligent film, and relies on the minds of its audience members to actively participate in the movie.

This is a Canadian movie directed by Bruce McDonald. If more movies like this come out of Canada, the impact would be phenomenal. The fact that it is such a solid film that was filmed on a comparatively TINY budget over only three days speaks volumes to the talent of those involved.

There are some plot holes, and the sometimes too thorough explanation of the zombie phenomena left me scratching my head, but I still appreciate the idea behind the movie and the execution of it, especially through the lead actor's talents.

If you like well-written, wonderfully acted, and thoughtfully directed movies, definitely check this out. It is a scary movie for people who don't typically like scary movies---but don't worry, horror nuts will like it, too.

The fact that it is Canadian is another reason to go see it. So many great movies are made by Canadians, and most simply don't make it into theatres. Support Canadian film and show the movie industry that we do want to see movies made by us, filmed in our towns, and telling our stories.

Pontypool is currently playing at the Oxford Theatre in Halifax. Showtimes can be seen on the Empire Theatres website.

Slow Down, Gandhi

2009-03-13T06:00:00.000-07:00

I am planning on exorcising my mind these next few days with insane movies, so as to replace the real-life madness with an imaginary sort. This, of course, makes not a lot of sense, as I should be trying to soothe my troubled head, but unfortunately I'd rather watch stop-motion puppets from Hell over Meg Ryan romantic-comedies, right now.

What I'd like to watch over the next few days:

The aforementioned FAUST with its creepy puppets.
Tetsuo--The Iron Man: Of which someone close to me said: I will never have a scary dream again. This is because TETSUO contained every scary dream that could ever be dreamt.
Last House on the Left: The 1972 one, because I've never seen it and that's wrong.
Maniac Cop: You Have the Right to Remain Silent. FOREVER.
The Element of Crime: The words "dazzling dystopia" were used in describing it.

Anywho, should be a good time these next few days. Aside from poisoning my mind with film, I shall be joining Andrew in his quest for an apartment. I shall be the dutiful assistant, one who has already gone through the rigours of shopping for a homebase. The newest homebase, if you haven't heard, will be in Woodside for the next year or so, starting this July. I'm excited.

Also neat: the summation of Battlestar Galactica which will soon grace our TV screens. I honestly have no theories as to how this is going to all going to play out. It's been a heck of a ride, and I wish the end wasn't in sight.

I miss Josh and I wish he was here. I would totally be down for some Tartan Asian Extreme with a side of pizzaronis and maybe a dance-party. Do you think deep-fried pizza bites could be shipped to Toronto and remain grossly delicious? I sense a challenge coming on.

The Silver Dart Takes Flight

2009-02-19T08:02:00.000-08:00

So, you've heard of the Wright Brothers, but not J.A.D. McCurdy?

Brush up on your Canadiana and check out the Nova Scotia Archives' tribute to Canada's first pilot, who took to the air in the Silver Dart on February 23rd, 1909, in Baddeck, Nova Scotia.

The Silver Dart was Canada's answer to the Wright gliders. The skill and innovation of talented individuals like McCurdy and inventor Alexander Graham Bell made it a reality.

McCurdy said of the experience:

"It was a brilliant winter day and the ice of Baddeck Bay was completely free of snow. We wheeled the aircraft out of its shed on the shore amidst the incredulous stares and remarks of a couple of hundred spectators who had gathered to witness the event. I having taken my seat, the machine was released and after a run of about a hundred feet, took to the air. I landed on the ice about half a mile away and taxied back to the starting point, and I think the thing that impressed me most was the look of absolute astonishment on the faces of the spectators."

McCurdy went on to become Canada's first licenced pilot, a pioneer in the aviation industry, and even held office as the Lieutenant Governor of Nova Scotia for five years.

To learn more about the Silver Dart and celebrations on Monday for National Aviation Day, check out the Centennial Celebrations: Baddeck 2009 website.

You see, whenever I start feeling sick, I just stop being sick and be awesome instead."

2009-02-12T06:01:00.000-08:00

After a semi-frustrating time last week, I have emerged feeling okay and am ready to sing my praises to various incarnations of awesome. Please note the following:

1. JCVD: Restored my love of Jean-Claude Van Damme as an actor while provided epic moments of high-kickery. Makes fun of Steven Seagal. Had full-scale audience cheering and clapping moments.

2. Yes To Carrots: This is a shampoo. A shampoo made from carrot juice. I am in love with it. It contains no paraben or wax (a lot of drug store shampoos have wax in them--makes your hair shiny, but causes build-up) and doesn't "strip" your hair. The conditioner is great, too. And it's affordable! Go carrots!

3. Bad Gal Lash by Benefit: Found this at the candy store of a make-up section at the Spring Garden Road Shopper's Drug Mart. Almost novelty-sized applicator, but it delivers. I am obsessed with mascara and give this brand five stars (good thing, as it was expensive). No clumps but lots of length. Awesome.

4. Blip FM: Gets me through the day with innumerable options for dance parties. Getting "props" from strangers for my less-than-good taste in music is pleasing, even though I basically just want to listen to the Jackson 5 all day. No joke.

5. Twitter IRL: The internet is now a conduit for socialization with fun people... I am agog, I am aghast. Haliblogaknittas was fun and the Twitter brunch afforded some great conversation over heaps of deliciousness. I am also slowly following the cast of Star Trek: TNG, patiently awaiting Jean Luc Picard's arrival (though my favourite is already tweeting--go LeVar).

6. Weekends: Old faithful of awesomeness. This weekend will involve: Jason Voorhees (I bet he likes gouda cheese and french fries with mayo), homemade pizza, C.H.U.D.(s), and a games night where I will no doubt win (and by win I mean give up and throw a hissy fit).

7. This song: It will get you through anything. JUST LISTEN TO THE WORDS.

8. Warranted Media Attention: I'm glad this fiasco actually got a lot of press. I'm hoping SMU stops being so lame about this kind of thing. I keep wondering what would of happened if this went down at my alma mater. I don't think any protesters would've braved the trip on the #80.

Friends, in these dark, dreary, and icy-sidewalk'ed times, we need things to hold us up with their awesomeness. What's making you happy at the moment?

Your move, creep!

2009-01-30T08:18:00.000-08:00

Thrillema keeps getting better, friends. Robocop was good fun, though I expected to see more cardboard-box costumes. One thing I really enjoyed about this event was the short-film shown during the pre-show, which was both was deranged and amazing. It's called "I Live In The Wood" and it will haunt me wherever I go. Stop-motion animation remains a thing of terror, for me, and if you don't agree please check out the work of Jan Svankmajer.

One new film-screening was announced during the pre-show: ALIENS is going to be screened at the end of March. I am salivating already. I might try to construct a face-hugger from paper-mache, or something, for the occasion.

Here are a few pictures from last night. It was another packed show, with a hilarious, raucous crowd. My favourite moment of the night might've been when the crowd was asked, "What is the only thing that can defeat Robocop?" and someone yelled out, "DARTMOUTH!" And rightly so!

I kind of love Peter Weller and described him as being "Dune-y looking"... because that sure makes sense. Not sure if I'm making it to the My Bloody Valentine showing on February 12th (just watched it last weekend), but I encourage others to do so, as the film's director, George Mihalka, will be there for a Q&A.

Have a bandwagon? I'll jump on it!

2009-01-29T09:02:00.001-08:00

Following the always awesome Jenn and transplanting a Facebook meme to the ol' blog, which seems to have very few readers, lately. Hmm!

1) I have my BPR but I hate public speaking and am awesome at being awkward.

2) When I was a kid, I wanted to be a writer. I'm glad that I've had opportunities to be published both through work and non-professionally.

3) The jobs I have had in my life are:
- Cashier at Sobey's
- Cashier at a second-hand book store
- Ride attendant AKA carnie
- Fundraiser
- PR Officer at a local bank
- Development officer at a major non-profit
- Newspaper columnist
- Tourist herder AKA gift-shop attendant
- Communications officer at the provincial archives

4) I have always been a hardcore nerd, and am happy that I am in a place in my life where a) It's welcome b) Offers opportunity for learning, socialization, and networking.

5) I am an information hoarder, whether it be random trivia, wiki articles, celeb gossip, or local happenings.

6) I watch a lot of movies, but only really starting doing so after dating Andrew because it was pretty much unavoidable, and not in a bad way. Paired with that, I love and am obsessed with award-shows. ESPECIALLY the red-carpet pre-show.

7) For years I have been musing about getting my EU citizenship. I hope 2009 is the year it happens. I'm not sure what I would do if I actually got it.

8) I dress like a bum but still manage to spend too much money on clothes.

9) I used to tan frequently, but have accepted my paleness in order to avoid nasty things like cancer... and wrinkles. It is of my opinion that I will have less wrinkles than all of my friends because I rarely smile. I am emo.

10) I have been going gray since I was 12, but refuse to dye my hair after the "purple" incident.

11) I have always gravitated towards being friends with men moreso than women, but in the last year I have spent more time with some great ladies.

12) I've lived on my own for well over a year now, but am still not used to it. I've always been kind of jealous of folks with great roomies, as living by yourself gets lonely sometimes.

13) I have a love affair with farmer's markets, flea markets, antique shows, estate auctions, thrift stores... it's an addiction.

14) I've been planning a second tattoo for like two years but haven't gotten it yet because I am a wuss for pain.

15) I've been "blogging" since I was 15. I am so happy that my journal from my high school years is purged, because I really was an idiot.

16) One of my happiest memories of Europe was sitting by the side of the Danube, watching it flow by while the city's lights reflected on its surface. A simple, but beautiful moment.

17) I love rollercoasters and have been white-water rafting. I want to go to New Brunswick this summer so I can try out Tree-Go. Funnily enough, though, I'm no good with heights and the thought of skydiving/bungee jumping scares me to death.

18) I have never had a cellphone, but feel myself caving in now that buses will be GPS equipped. I'm glad that I've held off for this long and have avoided unnecessary costs/over-connectivity.

19) I am within three degrees of Kevin Bacon (Me--> Crispin Glover, Tom Jackson, Michelle Williams --> Robin Wright Penn, Michael J. Reynolds, Burt Young --> KEVIN BACON).

20) I get freaked out swimming in open water, and have researched sharks enough to know how I would fend one off if I needed to. I've been scuba diving in the Caribbean, but probably won't do it again after the moray eel incident.

21) I have been known to edit restaurant menus (prime example: Smitty's).

22) If I had the time and resources, I could totally see myself getting into special effects make-up. I love a healthy dose of gore!

23) I am not a snob about movies, music, television and so forth, though it may appear that way sometimes. I watch crappy reality tv and enjoy a random rom-com from time to time.

24) I hate gender-specific insults. And making fun of people with disabilities. There is something just nasty about it and it always makes me wonder what lies below the surface with a person who uses them. For that reason, I don't like a lot of stand-up because I find it malicious.

25) I am addicted to knocking people off my Facebook "friends" list. My feelings about this were further cemented by a presentation I went to at podcamp the other day: http://www.onedegree.ca/2009/01/podcamp-halifax-unfriend-someone-today.html

Podcampin'

2009-01-26T11:30:00.000-08:00

It was the type of camp we nerds dream of: indoors, little to no physical activity (I had to click through some slides and nearly broke a sweat), and the only sign of "wildlife" being the "tweeting" of blackberries, cellphones, and macs.

Podcamp Halifax was good fun, and dare I say, I learned a bit. I didn't get to meet as many folks as I'd hoped (I'm awkward about introducing myself as Lauren from the internet), but despite this had a few good chats with the great folks that make up the social media scene around these parts.

Having heard of his legendary 28-person friendslist, I took in Joel Kelly's "Unfriend Someone Today" presentation first. Lots of topics were covered here, from reputation management, the legal issues surrounding googling potential employees, and naked guys who jump into Halifax Harbour. You can see the presentation here (video by Paul Wesson).

The second presentation was an examination of grassroots community building through social networking. The focus was on New Brunswick's Third Tuesday meet-ups, which have proved to be wildly popular. You can read Harold Jarche's presentation notes on his blog. I hope to see Halifax's Third Wednesday pick up the same way the NB events have, with an emphasis on "taking the show on the road" once in a while to different parts of the province.

The last presentation I went to was the smallest, but nonetheless very interesting. William Lachance gave us a walk-through OpenStreetMap and what local folks have been doing with it. The presenter is coming out with a very neat product based on OpenStreetMap that will have HRM bus-commuters throwing themselves at his feet, I kid you not. Watch this space. Another gem from this presentation that cannot be ignored is MappyHour. Click on Halifax, I dare you. You can read William Lachance's notes here.

The keynote address by Rocketboom founder/producer Andrew Baron (Nice guy, and a good sport about the terrible weather) was excellent, of course. I can't really do justice to the presentation, so I'll direct you towards this TwitWall and have you stay tuned for the full video of the presentation to be made available online. I will mention that this is the first time I've heard someone utter the term "Web 3.0" outloud---be afraid, be very afraid.

Congrats to the organizers of this fantastic event. I am already excited to 2010---no joke.

Oscar Nominations 2009

2009-01-22T05:57:00.000-08:00

Here they are, folks... the "big category" Oscar nominations for 2009. There's a few surprises, but for the most part everything seems to have come together as predicted. Here's the list of nominated actors and films, and my predictions:

Best Picture

The Curious Case of BB
Frost/Nixon
Milk
The Reader
Slumdog Millionaire

I think Slumdog is a shoe-in, especially considering its competition. Second favourite, for me, is Milk, followed by Frost/Nixon, The Reader, and the old man baby movie.

Best Animated Picture

Bolt
Kung Fu Panda
Wall E

Wall-E will win, unless hell freezes over.

Best Foreign Language Picture

The Class
Departures
Revenge
Waltz with Bashir

I think Waltz with Bashir will win. I'm a bit peeved that Let the Right One In wasn't nominated. Or The Band's Visit. Both amazing.

Best Adapted Screenplay

The Curious Case of BB
Doubt
Frost/Nixon
The Reader
Slumdog Millionaire

I think it's a race between Slumdog and Doubt. I'm frankly surprised that The Reader was nominated for Best Picture, and not Doubt.

Best Original Screenplay

Frozen River
Happy Go Lucky
In Bruges
Milk
Wall-E

IN BRUGES! YES! Such a fun, smart, sad, moving film. I hope it wins... but I'm thinking Milk or Happy Go Lucky might take it.

Best Director

David Fincher
Ron Howard
Gus Van Sant
Steven Daltry
Danny Boyle

It's Danny Boyle's year... finally getting the recognition he deserves after being snubbed for so long.

Best Actor

Richard Jenkins
Frank Langella
Sean Penn
Brad Pitt
Mickey Rourke

Mickey Rourke, hands down. Hollywood loves a comeback. Sean Penn is my second pick.

Best Actress

Anne Hathaway
Angelina Jolie
Melissa Leo
Meryl Streep
Kate Winslet

Everyone thinks that Kate Winslet (won the Golden Globe--but for the best SUPPORTING actress award [this is for The Reader not American Beauty II: The 1950s Were Serious]) is due for a win, here, but I'm not so sure. Anne Hathaway or Meryl Streep (tied for the award at the Critics Choice Awards) might actually take this. Be prepared for some glaring from Angelina Jolie, who overacted her way through Changling.

Best Supporting Actor

Josh Brolin
Robert Downey Jr
Philip Seymour Hoffman
Heath Ledger (Today marks the one-year anniversary of Ledger's death.)
Michael Shannon

SO many great actors here. If Heath Ledger doesn't win, I think it would be some sort of weird taboo. Josh Brolin was fantastic in Milk, and deserves the nod. This is RDJ's second nomination, and although I don't think he will win, I'm happy he was recognized.

Best Supporting Actress

Amy Adams
Penelope Cruz
Viola Davis
Taraji P Henson
Marissa Tomei

I really have no clue here... of all of these ladies, I think Viola Davis actually gave the most heartfelt performance (Doubt). But, who knows... maybe Amy Adams?

So there you go... now, we'll just have to wait and see the technical nominations. If you disagree with me, tell me! I haven't seen all of these movies, so some of my predictions are just calculated guesses. Was anyone snubbed that you think should have been nominated? There's a lot of people who think The Dark Knight should have been nominated for Best Picture and that Christopher Nolan should have gotten a Best Director nomination... other notable films missing Gran Torino and The Wrestler (deserved a Best Picture nod, I think)... what do you think?

The other awards have made it online, and you can read them here. There are two categories I am pretty happy about:

Best Documentary Feature

"The Betrayal (Nerakhoon)"
"Encounters at the End of the World"
"The Garden"
"Man on Wire"
"Trouble the Water"

THAT'S RIGHT, W. HERZOG! You rule! Although I LOVED Encounters, I think Man on Wire will take it, as it should... sheer awesomeness.

Best Original Song

"Slumdog Millionaire," "Jai Ho," A.R. Rahman
"Slumdog Millionaire," "O Saya," A.R. Rahman & M.I.A.
"Wall-E," "Down To Earth," Peter Gabriel & Thomas Newman

EAT IT, HANNAH MONTANA. I cannot believe that M.I.A. is nominated for an Oscar! Too amazing! I wonder if she'll perform, as she is pretty preggers at the moment. Kind of sad that The Boss didn't score a nod for the Wrestler, nor Clint Eastwood for Gran Torino. Ah well... too stoked for M.I.A.!

Я смеялся

2009-01-15T05:46:00.000-08:00

One day, Lauren walked to Russia...

We think she enrolled in the spy school.

From the Back of the Film...!

2009-01-14T04:58:00.000-08:00

In this post I talked a bit about the main three "movie nights" going on in HRM. In case you're not wise to their facebook groups, I thought I'd spread the news about some upcoming screenings:

Monday Night Movies at Park Lane Theatres, Halifax
Cost: $10.00

FIFTY DEAD MEN WALKING, January 26th, 7:00 pm

JCVD, February 9th, 7:00 PM
(Very excited to see this.)

Empire After Dark at Park Lane Theatres, Halifax
Cost: I *think* $6.99

THE GODFATHER, January 23rd, 11:30 pm
(I do not see the appeal in having this as a "midnight movie".)

The Thrillema at Empire Theatres 6, Dartmouth
Cost: $6.99

ROBOCOP, January 29th, 9:00 pm
(Attendees are encouraged to wear cardboard-box robot costumes.)

MY BLOODY VALENTINE, February 12th, 9:00 pm
(Better alternative than seeing the [most likely] disappointing 3D remake. Bonus: I think the original was filmed in Nova Scotia.)

LABYRINTH, February...I forget the specific date and will update this when I know...ahem..., 9:00 pm
(I need a spandex bodysuit, stat!)

Creep Show

2009-01-12T06:10:00.001-08:00

As another practice in self-cataloging, here comes a fun exercise for the new year: The Daily Mugshot. Every morning (well, mostly every morning) for the past few days I've been snapping a picture of yea olde face and posting it on the internet. There are a lot of cool examples of this, with some projects stretching over years. I don't think I'll go that far, as the gray hairs and emerging wrinkles will no doubt cause me to pull a Kanye and exclaim, "DAMN!!!! THAT'S SOME BENJAMIN BUTTON S%*#!"

Please feel free to add me to Daily Mugshot if you're already on there, so that we can, together, marvel at the weirdness of our faces.

Daily Mugshot

The Rumour Mill at Work

2009-01-08T07:22:00.000-08:00

Much like La Lohan, I'm sick of rumours startin' (and the paparazzi), as they tend to send my hopes skyrocketing, only to be brought down by another sad season of Nickleback and Hillary Duff shows. 2008 was the exception: it was an amazing year for the arts in Halifax, especially music. While there isn't a lot of buzz about shows yet, there are a few that began last year, and are building up momentum in the early part of '09.

Here are my, so far, favourite unfounded Hali-rumours of '09:

1. KISS will play Citadel Hill this coming July.

Basis:
In a recent interview, Gene Simmons states that there will be a summer Canadian tour, and that Halifax is a confirmed date.

But:
Something sounds fishy about this quote: "...but before you get out there and start the baseball season, they hold exhibition games, that’s what we’re doing."
I'm not sure if he thinks Halifax is some kind of baseball-town, or if he sees his band as a team. Either way, the guy is cracked, and whatever he's doing to his hair is seeping into his brain. But to state the obvious, yes, I'd go.

Fact or Fiction: I'm leaning towards fact, because Halifax seems to be destination number one for aging rockers.

2. Bruce Springsteen will play the Metro Centre in March.

Basis:
Randoms on a message board have confirmed through "unnamed sources" that the Boss is coming after either a Montreal or Boston date.

But:
When one quotes "unnamed sources" when they themselves are an unnamed source, things tend to be sketchy.

Fact or Fiction: The mainstream media has yet to report this, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed and my ear to the ground. An official announcement will supposedly be made on January 16th... according to an unnamed source.

3. A huge Sci-Fi/Fantasy Con in Halifax will attract the likes of Stan Lee and Patrick Stewart in 2010

Basis:
A Facebook group I just joined that seems to imply the organizers believe that Halifax can attract the big players of the Sci-Fi/Fantasy world.

But: ...I'm not quite sure the East Coast needs a "large-scale" Con, or that this group has means to pull it off, but I wish them well!

Fact or Fiction: So far the confirmed guests are Water Koenig (Chekov - Star Trek TOS, Psi Cop Bester - Babylon 5---neato!) and Jeremy Bulloch (Boba Fett---neato!), with the possibility of a YuGiOh voice-actor (not so neato) attending. Again, I wish them the best of luck in attracting more guests/vendors. James Callis can stay at my house!

Another unfounded rumour is that S. Spielberg is once again setting up camp in Halifax, but I've yet to see any buzz on the interwebs about that. I hope he films Tintin here, so that I may revel in the glory of his perfectly flipped orange hairdo.

So, Internet, what rumours are making you tentatively look forward to '09?

New Year's Eve

2009-01-05T06:21:00.000-08:00

A few people have asked me what I did for New Year's, and the answer of choice has been "not much". I hung out at a friend's house before the blizzard threatened to strand us, and then ambled home, much like the furry heroes in Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey (I would be Sassy: slightly aghast at having to hang around with her gross companions, good at getting into sticky situations, but when it comes down to it, sensible and generous).

The phrase "not much", however, does not express that the night was pretty hilarious. As proof, here are a few photos of New Year's Eve and the various shenanigans that occurred.

Chris brings out the theremin

...while Andrew plays the accordion

Together they make music that caused me to suffer greatly

Alternate methods of cigarette lighting are explored...

...as are alternate forms of transportation

We venture into the storm...

...AND ARE KILLED BY RAVENOUS CHRISTMAS TREES, WHO HAVE FINALLY HAD THEIR "TREEVENGE" AFTER YEARS OF HARDSHIP AND ABUSE

That just about sums it up. Somewhere in there is being proposition for drugs by a random who might have been fourteen, and jumping on a trampoline (Who puts a trampoline in their front yard?) somewhere in the south-end. A happy new year, indeed. I hope your New Year's Eve was just as fun, internet!

Movies of '09

2009-01-05T05:59:00.000-08:00

A continuation of last year's project. The number to beat hovers around 140-150. As an added component, this year I'm also going to keep track of television series I either complete or keep up with watching.

*Note: Somewhere around July/August I stopped keeping a 100% accurate list. Shame! Will attempt to vindicate self and dutifully update.

Movies:

January
Demons
In Bruges
Slumdog Millionaire
Doubt
Spoorloos
The Pick-Up Artist
River's Edge
Wanted
A Simple Plan
Gran Torino
Dead Alive
Harold and Maude
Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
Atonement
The Wrestler
Angels in America (Technically a TV Miniseries, but I think it belongs here)
Turkish Delight
The Fourth Man
My Bloody Valentine
Revolutionary Road
Lara Croft Tomb Raider: Cradle of Life
Soldier of Orange
RoboCop
Haute Tension
Ravenous
9 1/2 Weeks
O Brother, Where Art Thou?

February
Run, Lola, Run
Dark City
JCVD
Delicatessen
Total Recall
C.H.U.D.
Do The Right Thing
Evil Dead 2
W.
The Incredible Hulk
Bloodsport
Kickboxer
Frost/Nixon
Highlander
Boogie Nights
Vicky Christina Barcelona
Friday the 13th

March
Network
Lives of Others
One Week
Happy Gilmore
The Land of Faraway
Watchmen
Intolerable Cruelty
The Crazies
Faust
Maniac Cop
Pontypool
Element of Crime
Rock N Roll High School 2
Bourne Identity
Rabid
Mad Max
Mad Max II: The Road Warrior
Dead Ringers
Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels
Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?
A Boy and His Dog

April
Forgetting Sarah Marshall
The Haunting in Connecticut
16 Candles
The Cincinnati Kid
Vertigo
Flowers in the Attic
Werckmeister harmóniák
Heat
Mr. Death: The Rise and Fall of Fred A. Leuchter, Jr.
Deep Red
Observe and Report
Gone With the Wind
Sunshine Cleaning
Hard Core Logo
All About Eve
Close Encounters of the Third Kind
Rachel Getting Married
How To Lose Friends and Alienate People
Straw Dogs
Caprica
Conan The Barbarian

May
Near Dark
Lady in White
Wolverine
My Own Private Idaho
Control
The Fall
Highway 61
Snow Angels
Taken
A Night to Remember
Star Trek
Re-Animator
Children of the Living Dead
Wolfen
April Fool's Day
Tetsuo: The Iron Man
Storytelling
Candyman
Shindler's List
s. Darko
Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason
The Greatest Game Ever Played
Drag Me To Hell
Hot Rod
Hamlet 2
Paranoid Park

June
Il y'a longtemps que je t'aime
L.A. Confidential
The Hangover
Dumb and Dumber
Kairo
À l'intérieur
4 mosche di velluto grigio
He's Just Not That Into You
Young@Heart
Fanboys
Seventh Moon
The Third Man
Martin
Raging Bull

July
Brüno
Confessions of a Shopaholic
Last House on the Left
Don't Look Now
Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II
Memoirs of a Geisha

August
Swingers
Zombie Strippers!
Funny People
Inglourious Basterds
District 9
Look
Dogville
L'ultimo treno della notte
Halloween II

September
500 Days of Summer
Martyrs
Phenomena
Julie & Julia
Saved!
The Dirt Bike Kid
Shopgirl
Thirst
Trauma
Fear, Anxiety, and Depression
The Other Boleyn Girl
Act of God
The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
Africville: Can't Stop Now
Believe It
Paris 1919
It Came From Kuchar
The Invention of Lying
Antichrist
Dead Snow
The Trotsky
Bon Cop Bad Cop

October
Paranormal Activity
Where the Wild Things Are
Salò o le 120 giornate di Sodoma
Whatever Works
The Limits of Control
The September Issue
Zombieland
Nightbreed
The Gate II
The Stand
Castle Freak
Trick r Treat
Shades of Darkness
Forbidden Planet
Practical Magic
The Cabinet of Doctor Caligari
Village of the Damned
The New World

November
The Manchurian Candidate
Fatal Attraction
The Fourth Kind
Traffic
Don't You Forget About Me
Weird Science
Cabin Fever
Heathers
2012
The Princess Diaries

December
The Aviator
Helvetica
The Entity
Ninja Assassin
The Road
Dead of Night
Love Actually
Kinsey
Food Inc.
Away We Go
Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call, New Orleans
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
Cube
Good Hair
It Might Get Loud
Avatar
Sherlock Holmes
Troll
A Christmas Story
Doctor Who: The Waters of Mars
It's Complicated
Moon
----
215

Television:

SPACED
Battlestar Galactica
How I Met Your Mother
Entourage
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Freaks and Geeks

A Year in Movies

2008-12-29T05:22:00.000-08:00

First off---merry post-Christmas, everyone, and an early "happy New Year"---2008 is almost dead! I had a great Christmas in Dartmouth. Mia, le chat, was having such a good time at my parents' place that I left her there for a few extra days, much to the dismay of their cats that she tortures. She is small, but insolent.

The few days I had off were spent eating massive amounts of peanut brittle, watching SPACED and the Office (UK) Christmas special, and re-hashing old laughs with friends. When I got out of the house, it was to sneak in a few extra movies before the end of the year. I'm not sure if anyone paid attention to the top left corner of mein blog, but I've been keeping track of all of the movies I've seen this year (the book list was a failure, sadly).

All together, I recorded 140 titles. I think that accounts for 75% of what I watched (I remembered four as I wrote this blog entry). It's a pretty hilarious list. I only counted movies that I was seeing for the first time, so as to not bear the shame of highlighting multiple viewings of Iron Man (3), Sex in the City: The Movie (2), and Scrooged (3).

In the grand tradition of High Fidelity (3), here's a smattering of film top-fives and other ponderings to get you through to January.

My top five movies released in the past year would be something like: Iron Man, The Band's Visit, Man on Wire, Synecdoche, New York and a tie between Let The Right One In and that movie about a guy dressed as a bat. My taste in 2008 was a conflict between comic-book nerd and a keffiyeh-clad NSCAD student (but perhaps these things are one and the same).
The top ten (I couldn't pick five...) that I saw this year, but were not released in 2008, would be: Fur, Good Bye Lenin!, Jacob's Ladder, Less Than Zero, Withnail and I, Grizzly Man, Psycho, American Movie, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre ('74, not the one with Seventh Heaven), and The Tenant.
My top five of shame (as in I can't believe I watched these): Fool's Gold (Josh and I went to see John Rambo, but were late and settled for this. THEN I had to see it AGAIN on the flight back from Germany), Shall We Dance (It was on TV and I was too tired to shield myself), Definitely, Maybe (saw it in-flight), PS. I Love You, (Ditto---plane movie), and Cloverfield (Excuse me whilst I hurl).
My top five of "I thought these would be great, but didn't really like them": AUSTRALIA (Capital letters for an EPIC fail), Across the Universe, Mother of Tears (A big let-down), From Dusk Till Dawn, and Surveillance (An even bigger let-down---check out the trailer, it looks amazing, doesn't it? It wasn't).
I feel like this year the biggest thing that happened to me in terms of movies was seeing Encounters at the End of the World as it turned me on to Herzog. I'd long been interested in the guy, as he is my best homie Crispin's biggest inspiration as a filmmaker and, bonus, he is known as the guy who "tamed" Klaus Kinski, who gives me bad dreams. Herzog is now a definite favourite, up there with whomever else is in my top five favourite directors (I am too wary to define this. David Lynch is one. And maybe Steven Shainberg).
The second-biggest movie-thing would be my new found love for the entity known as Robert Downey Jr. Watching Iron Man led me on a weird quest to see a lot of his movies. There are some pretty bad ones, but a lot of great ones, too. This year I saw Chaplin, Less Than Zero, Wonder Boys, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Zodiac, and Tropic Thunder partly because I think this guy is an insanely good actor. And, yes, handsome for a middle-aged reformed junkie.

As a fitting end to a year where I watched too many movies, I think I'm going to stay in for New Year's and cram in three or four more films before the end of the year. Not sure what movies yet... there must be a weird balance of 1970s schlock, John Hughes, Todd Solondz, and some kind of new release. Fun party.

INTERNET---what were your favourite/least favourite movies of the year? Do you approve of my choices (no ill will towards RDJ will be tolerated)?

"I've got a grand piano to prop up my mortal remains."

2008-12-22T07:55:00.000-08:00

Christmas must be around the corner, as in typical fashion I have fallen ill. I'm reconsidering my decision to skip getting my flu shot (at the time needle vs. no-needle was an easy decision). Being sick around Christmas is kind of killing me, as I'm missing a party tonight, and am immune to cheer, goodwill, sugar cookies, et cetera. No fun, kids, no fun.

Now, regarding Saturday's Aussie Pink Floyd Show... it was great fun. This was my third time seeing them, and probably not the most satisfying, but still very good. They played The Wall in its entirity, and included some great visual effects ("3D" movies, WICKED COOL LASERS, a neat light show), and a very strong musical theater component, versus any of the other times I've seen them. "Fake Roger Waters", AKA "Pink" was the star, whether he was detached in his living-room or donning sunglasses and a leather jacket, ordering us to follow the "Hammer".

The Wall isn't my favourite Pink Floyd album, and I don't think it's an appropriate choice as a concert piece due to the number of effects and the level of skill required on the part of the musicians. But, once again, Aussie Pink Floyd proved that they are worthy of being endorsed by Dave Gilmour---they pulled it off beautifully. One important thing to note about this cover band: they may not play their own songs, but they certainly add a lot to the music they're playing in the form of rearranging songs and executing flawless solos.

The encore was 45 minutes long, and stuck to Dark Side of the Moon/Wish You Were Here for the most part. A nice little tribute was given to Rick Wright who died this past year, but, sadly, it didn't compare to the three-song homage that Syd Barrett got a few years back. Shortly after that song, a giant pig with glowing red eyes was inflated. It loomed over the audience during songs from the album Animals and actually looked quite frightening. The high-point of the encore was definitely "Great Gig in the Sky", performed soulfully by one of the three female back-up singers---she got a long, loud standing ovation.

In the end, I'd say it was great to see the band perform again and I would definitely see them for a fourth time, but probably only if they played a mix of tunes, rather that one straight album.

Okay. I'm going to crawl back under my desk now and continue my craving for Neo-Citran and great fistfuls of cough-drops. Fa la la la la, la la la la... blaaahhh...

Christmas Spirit Forced Down Yer Gullet

2008-12-18T05:25:00.000-08:00

To enter into the Christmas season requires a certain sort of ambiance, the type of mood you achieve at Halloween by listening to Hellbilly Deluxe and watching Ghostbusters for the umpteenth time. Unlike Halloween, you're pretty much aurally assaulted when Christmas approaches. Malls subscribe to some sort of never-ending satellite feed of holiday tunes that usually involves Bob Denver, radio stations play obnoxious covers of "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree", and churches, full to the brim for the first time since Easter, break out the carols.

The interweb isn't free from Christmas cheer, either, because bloggers like me like to post their favourite Christmas songs. Here's a few that I will torture my co-workers with for the days to come:

Everclear - I Will Be Hating You For Christmas
Lyric sample: Thanks for the Christmas card / I don't wanna hear about your new job now / I don't wanna hear about your new boyfriend / I don't wanna hear about it all working out for you
Recommended: if you're single and bitter or just like the '90s.

Bing Crosby and David Bowie - Little Drummer Boys/Peace on Earth
Lyric sample: "I could even have a go at 'White Christmas'!" / "You too, huh!"
Recommended: if you're human. No one can deny the goodness of the collaboration!

The Ramones - Merry Christmas (I Don't Want To Fight Tonight)
Lyric sample: I love you and you love me / And that's the way it's got to be / I loved you from the start / 'Cause Christmas ain't the time / For breaking each other's heart
Recommended: for New Yorkers, Stephen King, and Langly from The Lone Gunmen.

Sobeys Grocery Stores - Star of Christmas
Lyric sample: Bells are ringing/ Children singing / That warm Sobeys festive touch
Recommended: for Atlantic Canadians who could not avoid this song for years.

Star Wars Christmas Special Song
Lyric sample: We celebrate a day of peace / A day of harmony / A day of joy we all can share
Recommended: for this guy.

Muppets (and Michael Caine) - It Feels Like Christmas
Lyric sample: "You're a little absent-minded, spirit!" / "No, I'm a LARGE absent-minded spirit!"
Recommended: FOR ME! I love Muppets. This is the song where Scrooge begins to learn about Christmas! Bonus Muppet track: Fozzie and the Snowman.

Twisted Sister - A Heavy Metal Christmas
Lyric sample: On my heavy metal Christmas / My true love gave to me / 4 quarts of Jack / 3 studded belts / 2 pairs of spandex pants / And a tattoo of Ozzy!
Recommended: for Wayne and Garth.

And finally, the very necessary...

Run DMC - Christmas in Hollis
Lyric sample: Took out the license / And it cold said "Santa Claus" / A million dollars in it / Cold hundreds of G's / Enough to buy a boat / And a matching car with ease
Recommended: if you're dope, fly, fresh and are rockin' your Adidas

Send me your Christmas tunes, internet! What's on heavy rotation this year?

Prepare to be Dazzled

2008-12-11T04:45:00.000-08:00

Okay, guys. I did it. I read Twilight. I held back from bitching about it until I actually read the thing cover-to-cover (thanks, JB).

I don't really have a lot to say about the book, because, well, nothing really happens. 3/4 of the book was spent mooning over how mutually great the two lead characters are, and how dangerous it is that they are together. At this point, I have to wave my Whedon flag and say "HELLO! Do you NOT remember BUFFY?!"

Guess who:

- Super-attractive vampire
- Wants to protect female protagonist
- Doesn't like other vampires
- Doesn't kill humans to get blood
- They can't "express their true feelings" (cough cough) or he might "lose control"
- Warns female protagonist many times to stay away from him

It's not Edward... it's Angel! Angel who had fangs and a messed up face and didn't glitter like your grandma's favourite bedazzled (ha) Christmas sweater. And Angel didn't waste his friggin' time going to school. Seriously. If you were 17 going on 100, would you hang out in a biology lab? Angel had better things to do with his time, like wearing leather jackets, buying cow's blood, and hangin' out in the shadows. Word!

Besides the fact that I found the parallels between Edward and Angel to be uncanny, there's not much else to write about. It reads like something I would have written in high school (in a story where I would have been Bella, but would have told everyone else that it wasn't based on me) and I can completely understand why some people would like it, in that every once in a while you need to put down the Proust and have a little junk food.

I do, though, regret previously alluding to the Harry Potter series when I referred to this book. The trend, the screaming girls, they are there, but Meyer lacks the complexity, charm, and depth of character that Rowling brought to her books. And seeing as I didn't really like the last three Potter books, that should tell you something about Meyer's ability as a writer. She creates an okay little picture, alright, but didn't go into making it with a full box of crayons. Maybe the books get better as they go on, but I don't think I'll be picking up New Moon any time soon.

Final note: THE COVER.

A couple of years ago I was super-broke, and happened to fall into a mini-job, where I had to head to NSCC every few weeks and sit around and look haggard while a nice student in the photography program used me as his "model" (I use the term loosely because of aforementioned haggardness). A lot of nice pictures came out of this process, including the one below (that is copyright dude from NSCC whose name I forget):

WHAT THE HECK, GUYS? WHAT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN? Look out, I might be stalking you while you sleep, soon, or killing cute deer for their blood (unforgivable). Stay awaaaay.

It's beginning to look at lot like... debt!

2008-12-10T05:37:00.000-08:00

Oh, Christmas. I love it. Too much. Even worse, I like outdoing myself, topping whatever scheme I had going the previous year. I don't think I fully accomplished outcrazying myself, yet, but I've found some fun stuff.

This Christmas, I have maybe stepped into one store to buy gifts. The rest have been lovingly sorted out through the interwebs. This brings me great joy, as I am not a mall girl, and tend to be sucked into a) impulse buys and b) buying stuff for myself when I go shopping for others.

As with last year, I'm going to do a mini gift-roundup of shops I've bought from for this Christmas:

Amazon.co.uk: Because the item I ordered was times a million cheaper there than on Amazon.com (not even available on Amazon.ca). I thought it was lost in the mail, so asked for, and received a refund. On cue, the item arrived in the mail yesterday. I feel good and bad all at once.

Amazon.ca: They have the key to my heart. And fast shipping.

eBay: I bought two presents this year from good ol' eBay after a pretty long time spent avoiding auctions (there was an "incident" involving Paypal this summer that left a sour taste in my mouth).

The Sampler: Cute "stocking stuffer" esque presents such as prints, keychains, jewellry, and other baubles.

Bluefly.com: I cannot think of this store without hearing Tim Gunn's voice. There is nothing wrong with that.

Yard Sales and Flea Markets: 80% books, 10% movies, 10% peanut brittle (om nom nom).

Etsy: My love for Etsy has no bounds. I like that it's really easy to buy local, there.

Handmade: Really sad lookin'.

Next week (c'mon, payday) I am going to pick up some local stuff, at lovely places such as The Bookmark, the Farmer's Market, Pretty Things Boutique, and Strange Adventures. I will no doubt die when trying to brave the crowds, but it is worth it to do my part and inject a bit of cash into Halishops. I also have a secret scheme that a local artist is helping me out with... I'm excited to see the results!

This weekend will see me bein' awkward at the department Christmas party at Pier 21 (wearing this) and getting kicked off the stage at Retro Night at the Marquee---perhaps the LAST Retro Night ever! Bring your neon duds and fuzzy legwarmers and meet me there good and early... last time before it got crowded the DJ played bits of the Trainspotting soundtrack, which nearly killed me in its goodness. It's worth it to go just see my stupid reaction to songs like "Under Pressure". Trust me.

Crazy Canucks in the Commons

2008-12-02T06:28:00.000-08:00

So unless you have had a self-imposed media blackout this past week (maybe to avoid all those sneak previews of BRITNEY: FOR THE RECORD), you probably know that something ain't quite right in Ottawa. The Liberal and NDP parties have united in a Bloc supported coalition to overturn the Tory government, which they say parliament has lost confidence in. Who's at the head of this coalition? Stephane "Sorry guys, I'm stepping down" Dion.

As a young Canadian, I am pretty much used to being completely jaded in terms of who is running the country, but, frankly, this is all getting a little ridiculous. In protest of the current state of our government, I am suggesting we replace all 308 members of the House of Commons with a "coalition" of the following people:

1. The Original Cast of Degrassi

The national anthem will be replaced with the Zit Remedy's opus "Everybody Wants Something"(its lyrics ring true to every aspect of LIFE). Arthur and Yick always seemed pretty smart, and with the added sex appeal of sister Stephanie K, they could go "all the way" with any bill. Hawaiian shirts and fedoras would come back in fashion, and Wheels could get some kind of pardon and get outta prison.

2. The Muppets from Sesame Park

Patriotism across the country would rise, thanks in part to the country being run by a bear and an otter. Francophones would be pleased with the French vignettes that frequently appear in dialogue with the media. Fergus from Marie Soleil would be employed as a full-time interpreter.

3. The Surviving Cast of Hilarious House of Frightenstein (If there are any...)

Oh, if only. When in session, an MP would ask, "Mr. Speaker?" and have Vincent Price appear in a cloud of smoke, whispering, "Yessss? MWAHAHA." Science funding would increase with the addition of the Mad Professor as Minister Responsible for Kooky Experiments. Dancing in front of a psychedelic screen with a Wolfman and Igor to 1970s rock would be law.

4. The Kids in the Hall

An influx of women in the House of Commons would better reflect Canada's diverse population... oh wait...

5. The Cast of SC-TV

Bring John Candy back from the dead and Rick Moranis back from the comedy morgue. Hire Harold Ramis as a speech-writer and save Eugene Levy from another American Pie spin-off. They could form a joint government with the Chicago Second City, reuniting Ramis, Bill Murray, and Dan Aykroyd. We would be safe from ghosts AND end trade disputes!

6. Ross Hull from Are You Afraid of the Dark?

We all know "Gary" can be a stirring speaker, and aptly led his group of friends through frightening tales of ghosts and ghouls. Because of this, I'm pretty sure he can tackle other scary things, like the economy. Plus, he can also double as the nation's weather man.

7. The Trailer Park Boys

A kitten for every house! Legalized drugs! Rum and coke added to Canada's Food Guide! Corey and Trevor brought back from the brink! Mr. Lahey becomes Minister of %@%$!

And Finally...

8. Kenny Hotz and Spencer Nolan Rice

Let them choose what side they want to represent (liberal vs. conservative) and duke it out in a series of challenges like "Who Can Break the Most Laws" and "Who Can Have a Squid on Their Head the Longest". Democracy would prevail!

Now, the question must be asked... who is in YOUR dream coalition?

"Look out, Mama, there's a white boat comin' up the river."

2008-12-02T05:18:00.000-08:00

*Although I'm a few days behind in blogging about Saturday night's amazingness, I'm still, in fact, giddy. Neil Young and Wilco put on the best rock concert I've ever been to (and that's including the Stones and a bunch of other old fogies).

The stage was set with an old fan that slowly turned and cast flickering shadows across the stage. A man inexplicable spent the concert painting behind the band. A red phone sat on stage for some reason... probably a direct line to the President. Letters and numbers hung above the stage, in a seemingly random order.

I am a big fan of Young's early work, and was not disappointed with his song choice that seemed to be split between very old and quite new. Acoustic performances of "Needle and the Damage Done", "Heart of Gold", and "Old Man" were performed like it was the first time instead of the thousandth. Other songs really split the stadium with their raucous sounds and never-ending guitar solos. I really liked "Cortez the Killer", "Hey Hey, My My", and "Powderfinger" for all their power and grit.

Young played a fair bit of his newer work which is a little more twangy and "down home" than his earlier stuff. Much to my dismay, he did not play "Let's Impeach the President", which would have been hilarious. Also missed was a favourite tune... "Harvest Moon". Ah well.

While I am not a big fan of "Keep on Rockin' in the Free World" (too many benefit concerts, too much wank), there was no denying the energy in the crowd when Young burst out with the first few chords. Near the end of the song, the letters above the stage went out, save for four: N E I L. Amazing. The encore was a Beatles cover (I nearly died). With his wife Pegi on backing vocals, Young delivered a stirring rendition of "A Day in the Life".

Thank-you, Halifax. Maybe it was all the Nickleback concerts and the frequent Hedley appearances that made you want to repent. Here's my countdown for best "big" concerts of 2008:

1. Leonard Cohen
2. Neil Young and Wilco
3. Bob Dylan
4. Ozzy Osbourne
5. BACKSTREET BOYS (If you were not a 12-year old girl in the mid to late nineties you will never understand)

Honourable mention goes to my homie Crispin Glover, who is a real piece of work. He did not sing "Clowny Clown Clown" but I forgive him.

Next show is the return of Aussie Pink Floyd who I think are performing The Wall in its entirety (last time I saw them their first set was Dark Side of the Moon [almost typoed that "Dartmouth" of the Moon]). 2009 is already heralding rumours of The Boss and KISS making stops here... anyone feel like re-creating Detroit Rock City? I call James DeBello!

*(Image from the Herald.)

Pass the popcorn...

2008-11-25T05:38:00.000-08:00

For some reason (perhaps hell freezing over), it's actually not bad to be a "cinephile" in HRM right now. The film festival is over, Empire Theatres still gleefully possesses a monopoly... but something is different. There are now three, count 'em, three different "movie nights" (that I'm aware of) routinely bringing to the big screen well-loved classics and new features.

The oldest and most well-known of the movie-night lot is Monday Night Movies, brought to us by AFCOOP. Y'all know AFCOOP... they put on great workshops, run the Film 5 program, give scholarships, rent equipment, and are generally great. Monday Night Movies brings feature films, documentaries, and shorts to Halifax that would otherwise never make it past Montreal. Past films they've screened include Inland Empire, Primer, Coffee and Cigarettes, Saddest Music in the World, City of God, Bubba Ho-Tep, and last night's amazing film, Man on Wire. Admission is $10. A season pass is $60. Movies are shown on Mondays, obviously, at Park Lane. It's usually a good idea to stake out a seat early... this is a popular event.

Next on the docket is the very new Empire After Dark series. This is being put on by Empire Park Lane in Halifax, and will feature classic films, as voted by a Facebook group, shown at midnight. Just before Halloween they screened a double-feature of Beetlejuice and The Shining. I skipped the first part of the evening, but really enjoyed seeing The Shining at midnight. Prizes donated by the movie theatre were given out before the movie, and admission was cheap, only $7. There wasn't a big crowd at this event, and I didn't go to see last week's showing of Resevoir Dogs, so I can't really gauge how popular it is yet. Movies have been shown, so far, on Friday nights, so it's okay to stay up late, kids.

Last but not least is probably the most interesting of the bunch, in terms of delivery. ~~Halifax~~ Dartmouth filmmaker, Jason Eisener (of "Hobo With a Shotgun", "Teeth Beneath", and "Treevenge" fame), along with a group of film-lovers that includes journalists from The Coast and The Chronicle Herald, have started a movie-night called The Thrillema (thriller+cinema... I think). The Thrillema is presented at Dartmouth Empire 6, which I believe is closing next year. For $5 (!!!), you're treated to a lot of fun. The crowd (and I do mean a crowd) that goes out to this event has, so far, been amazing. Screenings have thus far been on Thursdays.

Before the film, trivia is presented on the movie, with lots of prizes to be won. A draw follows that... I believe the sponsors have been places like Last Game Store, Strange Adventures, and Pro Skate. Before the movie, there is an amazing film reel that plays, which includes old theatre ads and retro trailers for classics such as Werewolves on Wheels, The Devil's Rain, Star Crash, and Robocop. The two films that have been screened so far are Friday the 13th and The Thing. A Clockwork Orange will be screened on December 4th. Suggestions on the Facebook page include Braindead, The Toxic Avenger, Two Thousand Maniacs!, Eraserhead, Troll 2, and The 'Burbs. I hope they at least make it to Troll 2. Or The Gate 2...

So there you go, plenty of choices. You're covered for Mondays, Thursdays, and Fridays. If any chance of having a social life presents itself, you can always turn to Video Difference, Blockbuster, the interweb, or dust off your copy of The Conversations: Walter Murch and the Art of Editing Film. It's going to be ok.

I am so happy.

2008-11-18T05:26:00.000-08:00

This Friday I'm getting a new oven. For the first time in almost three months I will be able to BAKE, BROIL, GRILL, um... PRE-HEAT and so forth. The thing I'm most happy about is baking. I might not be the best cook in the world, but I can throw together some semi-awesome muffins, cookies, cakes... you get the idea.

To celebrate my new freedom to bake, I'm going to try to make the following goodies in the coming week:

I'm also going to dust off my copy of Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World and move beyond the basic vanilla and chocolate that I made a lot of earlier in the year. There's a recipe for tiramisu cupcakes in there that sounds amazing.

In other old-womanly news, I'm pretty much done my Christmas cards, and have about 40% of gifts accounted for. I'm feeling good, so far, and will thank myself when I'm not panicked the week before Christmas.

Like every other year. I'm still working on getting the boyfriend something weird and original. In previous years I've given him a theremin, a 100-year old banjo, the complete series of Are You Afraid of the Dark?, a t-shirt with Dennis Hopper's face on it, and so forth. I need to out-weird myself and am finding it difficult. If I could kidnap Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, put a bow on their heads, and sneak them under the Christmas tree, that MIGHT work.

Equally elderly, my friend Katie has re-started the book club that we took part in earlier this year. We're reading Divisadero by Michael Ondaatje, which has been really great so far (though I think my favourite work of his will remain The Collected Works of Billy the Kid: Left Handed Poems). Reminds me a lot of The Blind Assassin in terms of some of the narration and the focus of the novel being, so far, on two sisters, an illicit romance, and violence that tears a family apart.

If I can get my laptop to work (installed all necessary drivers... no dice) then I think I'll be back in business. The business of not-being-kept-from-doing-things-I-like. Word.

Problems w/ the interwebs

2008-11-13T04:40:00.000-08:00

Hai guyz. Thanks to some of you for offering to help moi. I thought I would make this easier and write a brief synopsis of what my problem is.

I got my laptop from a lovely gal who wiped it and set up everything for me before I got it. When I received it, everything seemed to be in working order except when I plugged in my LAN connection.

When I look at the 1394 LAN connection it shows no IP address. When I try to repair it, it comes back with "Failed to query TCP/IP settings of the connection. Cannot proceed".

When I check out my device manager, everything is dandy except for everything under "other devices"---those all have yellow question marks.

I've tried a bunch of stuff at this point (including reinstalling Windows again) and nothing has worked... some insight would be dandy! I'd owe you a coke!

Puttin' on yer face!

2008-11-12T05:30:00.000-08:00

This morning I skipped my usual "putting on my face" routine because I was running behind and needed to leave for work. Now I'm here, on time, but feel particularly grungy and without discernible features. I'm not a big "makeup head" but I certainly feel like I look my best with a bit of primping, which leads me to wonder... what is everyone else's morning routine for getting out the door and looking somewhat human?

Mine is as follows:

1. Have a clean face! I use an exfoliating facial cleanser that really wakes up my skin.

2. Moisturize! I didn't today and my skin feels so tight and dry it's disgusting.

3. Cheeks! I am pale and without cheekbones, so I blend into the apples of my cheeks some liquid blush.

4. Eyes! For work, I like to wear neutral colours that look kind of glow-y and make my eyes look brighter. A favourite is a shimmery gold eyeshadow by Clinique that I wish I remember the name of. I also like the "healthy glow powder" in Luminance by Eyes Lips Face as an eyeshadow. I sometimes top this off with some black eyeliner on my waterline.

5. Lashes! I wear a TON of mascara and go through it way too quickly. I have some MAC Pro Lash on the way, but am currently tiding myself over with Covergirl Lash Blast.

6. Lips! I go through lipbalm like crazy, and am currently running out of this great all-natural stuff I got at the farmer's market... it's a mint/chocolate flavour that I love, and it makes my lips feel great. I don't really like lipstick, so I usually stick to a clear gloss like Victoria Secret's Beauty Rush in Minty or a nude gloss like MAC's C-thru. Something I just got this week is a lipstain by Benefit (the new makeup section in the Spring Garden Rd. Shopper's is too great). It's called "benetint" and you can use it on your lips or cheeks for a "rosy glow"... I kind of love it, but too much of it makes you look like you ate about fifteen cherry popsicles.

7. Perfume! I love Demeter fragrances. My favourite is a blend called Sweet-talker that smells like maple syrup, vanilla bean, and maple leaves. I work in a building where I have my own little corner, so putting on a small amount of perfume doesn't have to bother anyone. Demeter is also great because it is very natural and does not use artificial colours, binders, or emulsifiers.

And I'm done! All of the above takes about ten minutes. So, ladies (and perhaps gents), what goes on your face before you leave to great the day?

Deer of the World---The Muntjac

2008-11-07T05:09:00.000-08:00

Much like Ben has an affinity for ducks, my one true love would have to be the graceful deer, ruler of the wilderness and friend to all creatures. If I'm ever feeling low, aside from a normal CuteOverload search for kittens or puppies, I make a foray into Flickr for images of baby deer, of whom Bambi did no justice.

On today's special, I'd like to highlight the weirdly cute Muntjac deer. They are the oldest deer in the worst, having appeared up to 35 million years ago in Europe. When running away from dinosaurs, they somehow ended up in Asia, where they remain to this day. Sadly, they did not make it to Can-a-da in their flight from T-Rex.

The Muntjac family of deer are extra-precious because they are TINY. How tiny? The Reeves Muntjac only grows to be anywhere from 16 to 40 inches tall, weighing anywhere between 22 and 40 lbs. See how the deer compares to a tyrant house-cat named Cuddles, whose habitat is in Dartmouth, Nova Scotia:

The cat dwarfs the deer and would probably eat it. With barbecue sauce.

For more proof of the animal's supreme cuteness, I dare to offer a video of the creature.

Even Maury Povich falls powerless to the thrall of the TINY DEER:

I suggest we import these babies all around the world, and subsequently achieve world peace, save the economy, and get RDJr. a one-way ticket to Halifax. Who's with me?!

Beers of the World---Faxe Extra Strong

2008-11-04T04:39:00.000-08:00

This is the first in a series of guest posts from the mysterious entity only known as A.A.. I have been attempting to lure him onto the interweb for some time now, and have finally succeeded! Enjoy!

I was almost tempted to call this an "unsung hero" of foreign beers. Upon further reflection, however, it seemed inappropriate, as Faxe has quite an evident cult following. I recall memories of being down on my luck and low on cash; of seeing others at the NSLC in the same situation, be it university students or senior members of any city's homeless community; a regular of those who simply practice routine efficiency and frugality; that nostalgically bitter gulp here and there while indulging in the very rewarding act of underage drinking.

Faxe comes from Denmark, which is automatically a plus. Not only is this the same country that produces the heavenly Carlsberg Lager, but being that said product is Danish, while pounding back these poignantly decorated tallboys you can pretend you are a viking, like the guy on the label. (Note to mention if you actually are capable of "pounding back" Faxes by the tallboy, you certainly are worthy of being called a viking.)

At 10% alcohol content (for Faxe Extra Strong that is, there are weaker varieties of Faxe out there), I'm going to say this is the most potent beer available in local liquor stores. The price is somewhere around the $2.50/500ml mark, probably making it the best "bang" for the buck. And in terms of "bang", most would shrug this beer off as a cheap-trick kind of beer beer, I'm sure. But give it a chance, and I'm sure you'll find this beer is more than just an easy route to climaxing--there is a flavour in there, and it has a mark of its own.

Speaking now purely in terms of flavour, I'll say the negative upfront: the high alcohol content is really what drags this one down. The ethanol is apparent immediately--it is that distinct-but-not-pleasant sweetness that rolls down the tongue and stretches the aftertaste to your throat. Now there are plenty of European beers that have the knack of dubiously hiding their high alcohol content--sometimes up to 14%--underneath the taste somewhere (see: ~700 varieties of Belgian beer), but Faxe certainly isn't one of them.

At its heart, the beer has a flavour comparable to any mediocre, trashy Canadian beer... I don't know, say Molson, or Moosehead Dry. Neither of these I find particularly titillating, but they do represent the middle of the line, eh?

Ugh, how can I write more? To be honest, the taste isn't great, and it is a struggle to get the last drop out of the can even after a few... But low price and high consistency? Sounds good to me. Time to crack open my last tallboy...

For my closing statement... Paul Giamatti summarized it best in Sideways: "Quaffable, but uh... far from transcendent."

Another Halloween has been and gone...

2008-11-03T05:47:00.001-08:00

And I have the scars to prove it. Literally.

For this Halloween, I decided to be a cyborg from the future sent back to terminate the leader of the human resistance, John Connor. My costume, or rather, makeup, was pretty rad.

I bought a prosthetics kit from the interweb from a company named Woochie. The kit came with "cyborg pieces, spirit gum, injury tray, burn scar" and some makeup. I essentially had to fuse the latex pieces to my skin with the "spirit gum", mix together the "burn scar" (essentially pink jello that was VERY hard to apply and made a big mess) with hot water and mould it onto my face, and then cover the whole thing in make up.

The box said I'd like like this (minus the receding hairline):

I ended up looking like this:

Not too shabby! The guy above clearly has more forehead than me, so I stuck my other prosthetic on my upper chest. Fellow T800, Ryan (who used tattoos to get his look), and I stalked the dance floor for John Connor, who was no where to be found...

Lots of people figured out who I was supposed to be, so I was happy. The prosthetic was kind of uncomfortable to wear, because I couldn't talk or smile very well, but I guess that fits in with the character.

When I got home, I broke out some makeup remover to take off the prosthetic, as was recommended. Unfortunately, the thing stayed fused to my skin. At this point it was VERY late at night and I wanted to go to sleep, so after attempting to take it off with soap (fail) and rubbing alcohol (fail) I decided to peel it off.

Bad idea. I woke up the next day to what looked like a bruise, a small cut, and some broken blood vessels on my face. It's been three days since this, and I've still got visible damage to my poor wee cheek. Not cool. Next time I attempt any sort of crazy makeup, I'm going to contact the company if they can send me their own brand of remover, because I could have been a terminator for the REST OF MY LIFE had I not sacrificed my face by ripping off the makeup.

More pictures from this very entertaining Halloween are on my flickr.

Bye bye, Lappy

2008-10-27T09:46:00.000-07:00

RIP LAPTOP, 2003--2008

You were always kind of lame, and too heavy to bring places, but I loved you nonetheless. You got me through university and many a MSN conversation with boys I had crushes on. You hold (and hopefully will let me have) all of my favourite photos and many years worth of crappy writing. I tried buying you new parts, but, alas, you will not accept them. Now I am without cable or the interweb, and will silently suffer with my collection of VHS, hoping someone will call me on the telephone, as I have no better way to communicate.

Remember that time we went to Montreal, Lappy? We watched Suspiria in a cheap hotel and Google-Mapped our way around the city. Those were the good times, the fun times, back when you accepted electricity and didn't permanently exist under my couch. I miss those days... the days of your youth that will never be again.

I will continue to mourn thee until something new comes around, and I'm saved from perhaps doing housework or taking up a hobby.

Sigh,
Lauren

Weirdo Meme!

2008-10-20T11:39:00.000-07:00

Another meme brought to you by dessert-maker extraordinaire, JB!

The Rules:
1. Link to your tagger and list these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blog.
4. Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

1. I cannot stand seeing most movies more than once (sometimes to the dismay of my boyfriend who once watched Detroit Rock City every day for a month), but definitely don't feel that way about books. There's a random assortment of books I'm sure I've read more than fifteen times, including The Robber Bride, Scarlet Feather, every single book in the Narnia series, a kids book called From Anna that still makes me weepy, Little Children, The Gunslinger, Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging, some book on werewolves I basically tried to steal from the library when I was 10, Sophia Loren's guide to beauty, and so forth.

2. I don't consider myself a picky eater, but refuse to eat pretty normal things like tomatoes, raisins, bananas, candied fruit/fruit in any dessert form (with the exception of apples), pineapples, most things containing gelatin, olives, pickles, any kind of hot pepper... and on and on and on...

3. Despite my aversion to supposedly delicious food, I have eaten ants, crickets, tree roots, various plant-life I've dug up from the ground or picked in the woods, and once slept for three nights in a lean-to I made from pine boughs... in the rain.

4. I love-love-love online shopping, and own stuff from ModCloth, LuLu's Fashion Lounge, Label of Hope, Pretty Raccoon... constantly looking for new, DIY, OOAK beauties!

5. I have a friggin' dent and a scar on my leg from when I fought with my sister and fell "shin first" onto an upturned rake. I have a scar on my chin from when I face-planted in the church parking lot in grade 10, resulting in stitches and having gravel picked out of my face. I have only broken a bone once in my life... when I was moving during the summer before second-year university and broke my foot just in time for "back to school".

6. Monkeys creep me out and I kind of hate them. Really. The only monkey I ever saw that I liked was one in the Biodome in Montreal. It was tiny and cute and nonthreatening. The rest should be shipped into space.

7. Some friends and I were once kicked out of a Dan Aykroyd concert. Really. Not before we had the chance to yell "PSI FACTOR!" at him, though. We spent the rest of the show perched on a windowsill trying to look in.

I'm tagging... The Blah Blah (double-tagged!), Inspired By Hope..., Crafty Bitch (double-tagged!), Justin Gill, The Decisive Moment, Ruby Red and the Secrets of the Century, and Just Putting it Out There.

Blog Love!

2008-10-20T11:01:00.000-07:00

JB at La Belle Ecrivaine was lovely enough to gift me with a Brillante Weblog award (acceptance speech here as relayed by RDJ)... and I'm passing on the favour! In random order, here are my five pics:

1. If Charlie Parker Was a Gunslinger... There'd be a Whole Lot of Dead Copycats

An amazing series of photos, art, albums, posters, and other signs of the times... this collaborative blog walks you through an astounding collection through categorizing its entries. A is for Arbus, Great Canadians of the 20th Century, Sex Education, Annals of Crime, Tricky: Scenes from a Life, and Seminal Images are all worth checking out. Spend time exploring the site... there is something for every culture junkie.

2. Ultra-Condensed Movies

I have been known to watch a sickening amount of movies... but this lovely blogger makes me feel like I am not alone! Great gobs of films are watched and smushed down into bite-sized morsels... if a morsel could be HILARIOUS and WITTY (to borrow her use of CAPS). Some fave entries of mine include Jaws, First Wives Club, Princess Bride, and Sex and the City.

3. Travelling Two

Ever wish you could sell all of your possessions and travel by bike around Canada, Europe, and Asia until your money ran you. Well, this Canadian couple did it, and are STILL doing it after TWO YEARS. Check out their map. I am sore just looking at it.

4. Living the EC (East Coast) Life

I love reading Kimberly's entries on books, movies, her adorable dog Tofu, and her various travels... but, strangely enough, I get really excited when she blogs about restaurants! I think I like food too much. Kimberly also heads up a great Literary Association/Journal---check it out!

5. The Blah Blah

For sharing an unabashed love of uncommon music and film, and his tales of horror and joy from retail work, Josh gets an A+. For the lulz, read about the Fantastic Disaster Weekend that I shared with him, or, unknown to Josh at the time, the shooting of the infamous Jonzed movie.

Enjoy! I am off to see Encounters at the End of the World tonight, which is cool as I've been interested in Antarctica since a big space-ship flew out of it in Fight the Future AND Herzog is Crispy Glover's favourite director. Win, win.

Holy frak!

2008-10-17T07:12:00.000-07:00

Things that make me sad:

My laptop is once again... DEAD. It may rise from the ashes in a zombie-like stupor and work again in a few weeks, but I doubt it. It wouldn't be one of those fast-running Danny Boyle zombies, either, but a stumbling, mall zombie that's easy to take out with a baseball bat. Tom Savini needs to get ahold of this sucker and give it a bad-ass makeover. Or maybe I'll just save up for a Mac.

Things that make me happy:

At the moment.. TELEVISION. It has been my savior Communications Blackout '08. Can't check your email, facebook, twitter, et cetera? Watch an episode of Weeds, catch up with Dexter, or get excited about the Sarah Connor Chronicles. Sensing that the next few weeks will be completely sans interweb? Watch, oh, three friggin' seasons of Battlestar Galactica thanks to an oh-so generous friend who also tuned you into Firefly.

The same generous friend has gifted me with a lovely little award! I am not worthy... I am scum! Seriously, JB's blog is great, with tons of recommendations if you like fun TV/Movies and generally great life stories. In the coming days I will think of five bloggers to pass the award onto.

Back to... my impending socially awkward phase. Friends, I am now one of those nerds, happy to be labelled "sci fi". Wheras before I merely treaded the line with an over-zealous X-Files and Buffy appreciation (and Robert Downey Jr. stalk...err...supporter...), I am now happy to be known as someone who curses using the word frak.

In correspondence with this new phase of nerd, I've put together a pretty geeky Halloween costume courtesy of eBay. I'm very excited to reveal it to the world come Halloween. Your clue: Eddie Furlong's gonna get it... he better put down his cigarette and Rock Star beverage and RUN (obvious enough). Andrew's got a pretty cool thing going on, too, so I'll have to have a photoshoot on the 31st. You Better Work!

In the spirit of Halloween, I'm asking all of you to tell me your absoulute favourite costume ever! Mine, this year excluded, is a bad-ass zombie costume I wore in 2006. When you see a zombie with a gun, walk, don't run!

Show me your get-ups, lest I make you watch The Gate or The Gate 2!

They should have put this in the job description...

2008-10-06T07:00:00.000-07:00

Wanted: one PR pro who is interested in Nova Scotian history, has a knack for writing and design, and is willing to dress up like an old broad once in a while. A really old broad.

Here I am, a deadly mix of Les Mis style peasant, Copacabana regular Lola, and Dawson City showgirl. All in the name of spreading the good word about responsible government.

A few archives cronies and I hit up Province House for Democracy 250 celebrations on October 2nd. We were there to show of our brand new virtual exhibit, Voices of the People, which features petitions and correspondence from (and to) the Nova Scotia House of Assembly from 1758 to 1800. If you want to know what the average Maritimer of the day was concerned about, have a look through this exhibit. Petitions range from complaints about roads around the province (sound familiar?), a widow asking to be released from debtors prison, a surgeon asking for compensation for innoculating poor people against small pox, and the ever important subject of rum.

The celebrations at Province House were very well organized, and featured dozens of reenactors that livened up the day. A performance from cast-members of DRUM and a smudging ceremony started off the event, and a proclamation was made by the Premier. The house adjourned for some democracy cake (mighty tasty) shortly after, and were treated to lively dancing, actors portraying famous Nova Scotians (Joe Howe was amazing), and displays of documents from the Leg Library.

Throughout the day I was able to meet three premiers, and even shared a few glasses of wine with one. Everyone who came through Province House seemed to be genuinely enjoying themselves, and quite liked seeing our web product, along with the ever-popular Nova Scotia Genealogy site. This was my first time going "on the road" with the online resources team, and it was a great experience... even if we were just down the street.

Here's a few more pictures from the day:

Gamblin'

Lovely symphony quartet

This guy was extolling the virtues of France when he noticed the flag behind him. O fie!

In the Immortal Words of Crispin Hellion Glover...

2008-09-25T05:09:00.000-07:00

WHAT---IS---IT?

For my birthday, an awesome family member gave me this "device" as a present. It's some kind of hand-whittled, homemade, stringed... something. Its origins are unknown. It sounds like the Amityville Horror meets the Garbage Pail Kids. I have googled and googled but cannot find a name for this curiosity. I have been calling it the Hills Have Eyes guitar as it looks like it was fashioned by mutants in the mountains. If you can figure out what this is, I owe you a cherry coke.

Michael Berryman doesn't know... do you?

It's oh so quiet... shh, shh!

2008-09-22T05:09:00.000-07:00

Things have been quiet in interweb-land, lately, because I've been fortunate enough to have found myself... doing... things... in real life. Don't worry, my mind is blown, too.

This past week I turned 23 and got to celebrate it many times with family, friends, and more family. The immediate fam and I went out on Tuesday for Mexican food, where I was forced to wear a giant sombrero and was sung to by waiters. Two of my favourite things, I assure you.

Friday som e co-workers and I visited the Coastal Cafe for lunch, and I am officially smitten. I've had their breakfast before, but believe me when I say lunch is on a whole new level. I'm happy that the restaurant is a good distance from my apartment, lest I spend every waking moment there.

Friday evening, some friends and I braved the crowds at the Fireside for dinner, somehow squeezing many bodies into one couch and several chairs. It struck me funny for a second that there was only one other lady with me, and when she departed I was hanging out at a pub with about ten wonderful guys. All women should be this lucky... I have my own personal harem.

Saturday was the last day of the film festival... I am so sad it's over! My friend Sarah surprised me with a ticket to see Chasing Wild Horses/"Lost + Found"/"The Trap"/"The Book Lady" on Saturday afternoon, which I was very glad to accept. All were wonderful films... involving some of my favourite things (Cape Breton, Harper Lee, DOLLY PARTON!!!, PONIES!!!).

That evening was the closing party of the film festival. I must admit I didn't really pick up on the bands playing, though I listened to Rich Aucoin for a bit. That evening will be known as the night of too many drink tickets, which were being fed to me by a number of people, including the one and only Gregor Ash. Alas, I had a good time nonetheless.

Yesterday my grandparents were nice enough to throw me a mini-bash, which included my favourite cake of all time. I tell you, I can eat boiled icing until I pass out. That stuff has drug-like properties. Majorly delicious.

This week I am looking forward to a bit of downtime, outside of work (where Democracy 250 is fast approaching, thus I am in a frenzy). I am looking forward to a co-worker's wedding on the weekend, which is taking place in a century-old grist mill in Tatamagouche. The Strangeboys will be playing the wedding-march, and the wedding cake is not a cake... but dozens of cupcakes. The fun cannot be stopped.

Film Festival Update

2008-09-10T07:43:00.001-07:00

It's here! The film festival kicks off tomorrow with a showing of Blindness and a night on the "red carpet" at Argyle Street. Having scored VIP tickets to the opening gala, my goal is to become best friends with the cast of Trailer Park Boys and drink free champagne. There are rumours on and off the interwebs that Kevin Smith and Mark Ruffalo might be making a trip here, but nothing is confirmed. Seeing as I am mildly annoyed at Kevin Smith (because of Clerks 2) I'm not sure what to think of his potential Q&A session after Zach and Miri. I am tempted to go, but only if I make scowly faces throughout it.

For anyone interested, these are the movies I've been able to catch so far.

"Treevenge"
"There Are Monsters"
Midnight Meat Train
"The Scavengers"
Sheltered Life
Gonzo: The Life and Times of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson
"Dartmouth Werewolf in Dover"

Not as many as I would have liked to have seen pre-festival, but a healthy bunch, certainly. Remaining films (that aren't sold out, aka Blindness and Growing Op) that I'm going to catch for sure include Surveillance, Repo!, and, sigh, Zack and Miri Make Porno (for the prereq potential Smith heckling).

This Friday I'm also taking part in Kodak's Stop By. Shoot Film. program. It's a two hour crash-course on the basics of 16 mm filmmaking. Andrew (man, do I ever need a nickname for him---ideas?) took it last year and highly recommended it. My brother-from-another-mother Josh is attending as well. Mad skills to be had!

Looking past the film-fest, Democracy 250 is getting me excited. October 2nd's DeLorean trip to 1758 looks like it's going to be good fun. Today, a major D250 (free, outdoor) concert is being announced called "Rockin' in the Free World" which is said to include "huge" Canadian recording artists. It's being held on September 27th at Grand Parade.

Excerpts from out on the Mira

2008-09-05T04:41:00.000-07:00

This past weekend the red-headed one and I took a trip to Cape Breton. We divided our time between the Ingonish area and North Sydney, and somehow also managed to take a trip around the Cabot Trail. We stayed with some of his very gracious relatives and slept a stones throw from the beach. A great trip, even if the weather didn't co-operate.

Anywho, less prattling, more action---here are some pictures from the weekend. Enjoy!

Joe's Scarecrow's near St. Joseph du Moine

Beulach Ban Falls

At the end of the Middle Head hike, with Smokey in the background

Along the Middle Head hike near Keltic Lodge

Traps near White Point

OM NOM NOM NOM

Abandoned gold mine on Clyburn Valley hike

My new favourite dog---Chloe!

(The full set of pictures can be found on my Flickr---here.)

Bright Lights, Small City

2008-08-28T05:06:00.000-07:00

The Atlantic Film Festival is looming in, with opening festivities starting on September 11th. This year's program promises Hollywood features alongside local endeavours. Am I excited? In a word, YES!

I have "a man on the inside" this year, so I'll be able to check out some films from the comfort of my living room (we watched "Treevenge" and "There Are Monsters" last night). But, there are still some movies I'm definitely going to try and watch in theatre. What are these films? Read on...

Blindness: I've been going on about this one for a while, because I love the book that it's based on. There are rumours on the internets that Mark Ruffalo might come out to the opening of this.

Repo! The Genetic Opera: Anthony Stewart Head sings... again? Okay! This film looks just campy enough to keep it out of Saw territory. We'll ignore the fact that Paris Hilton is in it.

Zach and Miri Make a Porno: Okay, Kevin Smith, I might think you're gross, but I usually try to see your movies anyways. And then complain about it afterwords. Sigh.

Cronos: Guillermo Del Toro and Ron Perlman team up... in 1993? Pre Hell Boy film that looks smart and creepy.

Gonzo: The Life and Work of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson: You have got to respect the good doctor.

A Dartmouth Werewolf in Dover: Wherein Matty Mays & co. go to England to record an album. Terror ensues.

Patti Smith: Dream of Life: I love this lady. This film has been years in the making... so glad I get to finally see it.

Word of Advice -- William S. Burroughs on the Road: Not sure if this is a film of Burroughs on Kerouac or Burroughs on himself or... hmm? Either way, Old Bull Lee is always interesting.

The Scavengers: Cory Bowles' first foray into film-making. And it's about a mermaid!

Surveillance: Jennifer Lynch (David's daughter) tries it again. Looks a lot better than Boxing Helena.

That's all I've got for now, besides an urge to see as much Atlantic Canadian content as possible. My birthday always coincides with the festival, which is both good and bad. The day that I was planning on doing birthday-stuff coincides with a Tom Fun Orchestra/Hey Rosetta! show. I think the gods are trying to tell me something...

Really... what did I expect?

2008-08-25T06:01:00.000-07:00

Dear Hooters,

I was skeptical at best. Well, really I was sarcastic and smarmy but let's put that aside. I gave you a chance! I put aside my feelings and decided that you deserved to be given an opportunity to prove that you were more than just barely clothed Dartmouth girls (it's okay, I shuddered, too).

Myself and two companions entered with nary an undeserved comment or sideways glance. Even when we were neglected for nearly 15 minutes before getting a drink order, we had hope. We did not speak of the tiny outfits or the scary-looking exposed kitchen. Really, Hooters, what else could we have done?

First our server apologized for the wait, explaining that she was the bartender this evening. But, Hooters, she was not serving drinks! There was maybe 10 people in the entire restaurant! Instead, she was at a table of greasy looking men, pretending to talk with a mussel shell! What a comedian!

And then, Hooters, when she took our order, she neglected to tell us that we got sides with our meals! When I asked her, she said we assumed that we all wanted baked beans! We had to ask her to change our order, which had already gone to the kitchen. Shame!

Our food was brought back fairly quickly, with the aforementioned sides being small enough to fit in a Dixie cup (that being what they actually were served in)! My sandwich was greasy and barely edible, as was my friend's chicken sandwich. My other companion's "gourmet" hotdog was only served on half a bun! When we brought this up, our lovely server said "Oh." and yelled into the kitchen playfully, "Boys, why'd you give her half a bun! Give her a FULL one, next time!" to which the kitchen staff replied "Okay."

Oh, Hooters, our server was not very good. She spent half the time at the greasy guys' table, leaning over, shimmying, and flirting. No doubt she got a good tip. When she took our plates away, she asked if we minded waiting a while for our bill. Without being able to reply, she danced off again to the greasy table.

Fed up, we went to the bar to pay, and had to tear our "Hooters Girl" away from the grease table to get our bills. When my friend paid, she pointed out to him that he hadn't left a tip to which he replied, "I know."

So, Hooters, when people tell me that I speak of you unfairly and didn't give you a chance, I can honestly reply that I tried to enjoy a meal at the restaurant but found the food terrible and the service even worse. No doubt I would have found it different if I was with a group of men, but I feel I deserve equal service. Some men might tip more just because you're cute, but I expect at least half-attentive service. "Hooters Girl", I hope you enjoy the remaining 6 to 8 months you'll be able to pull off that outfit.

No love,

Lauren

When good ceilings go bad

2008-08-20T05:34:00.000-07:00

It was a normal morning... or was it? From my cubicle I saw that something wasn't quite right with the ceiling. Parts of it seemed to be... missing...

Intrigued, I got up to investigate. A leak had destroyed the particleboard, leaving the rusted pipes in the ceiling exposed. I repressed my fear of mould spores flying out and clogging my lungs, and took a closer look.

Something was up there. Something peculiar. Something that would perhaps... quench my thirst? Could it be?

LIME CRUSH was holding back a torrent of water above my head. LIME CRUSH has apparently been in this ceiling for TWENTY YEARS. In Nova Scotia, if you have a leaky pipe, never fear, because LIME CRUSH will be there for you! Unfortunately, you can't get a nifty steel can like the one above anymore. That can is antiquated. That can might be older than me. I am hoping and praying that somewhere up there is a bottle of Orbitz. That stuff was damn tasty.

Dear Neil Young

2008-08-19T04:56:00.000-07:00

Hi! I think you're awesome! I love Buffalo Springfield. I think CSNY is great. I love that in The Last Waltz Scorsese had to edit out the lump of cocaine that was hanging out of your nose. Yes, Neil, I think you are a cool guy.

After I saw two members of the holy trinity of music (you may know them as Bob and Lenny), I mused over the possibility of you hitting Halifax sometime this year. Never would I have ever considered that my insane babbling would prove true.

Neil, I think you're a great guy, but we have to talk. It's awesome that you're gracing our fair metropolis with your presence, but the prices, Neil, they're a little steep. Two hundred and fifty dollars for lower bowl? I mean... really? And eight bucks plus for a standing-room only floor? Neil, Neil, Neil... you don't need the money that badly, do you? Didn't Living With War sell? And now you've put out a sequel to Chrome Dreams... that's great!

You've put out an album basically every year since 1969... do you really need to gouge your fans with ticket prices? I'm still going to try to get tickets, Neil, but I'll have to make some sacrifices. You don't want an audience full of balding baby-boomers, do you? Because, Neil, those are the only people who can afford your tickets!

If you'd like to say sorry, I am free for lunch. Please bring Pegi. I think she's great, too.

See you in November.

xoxo Lauren

PS---I can basically forgive you for any misgiving because you're bringing Wilco. THANK-YOU!

Wherein Lauren goes adventuring

2008-08-18T05:28:00.000-07:00

Despite a number of setbacks, and fears of massive cancellation fees, we made it out of the city yesterday to the fair hamlet of Shubenacadie. Saturday's bout of rain had subsided and the sun was shining. Yes, it was a good day.

We made it to the Tidal Bore Rafting Park at around 11:00, and were shuffled into a line-up with about 50-60 other people to receive a lifejacket and, if we wanted one, a raincoat. Seeing as we were going on the water and were going to get soaked anyways, the raincoat seemed like a silly idea... it certainly wasn't going to help you if you got thrown in.

Lifejackets secured, we waited to be taken down to the water. We were led down an almost rickety set of stairs to an oozing mud-flat that we had to cross to get into our boat that looked like it could fit about ten people. Our tour-guide loaded us up and set out across the river rather quickly, pointing out eagles' nests and rock formations. At one point, the biggest horse-fly I've seen in my life landed on the nose of the boat. The thing looked like it was the size of a quarter, and was clinging onto the boat, probably in hopes that it could find some lunch.

In an effort to shake the bastard off, the tour guide flipped into warp speed and nearly threw all of us off (at this point I lost my beloved Van Halen hat). You don't exactly sit down on these boats, but perch on the side, gripping a piece of rope that is behind you for dear life. Through a mix of balance and leg-support you hang on... the rope really didn't help much.

After we voyaged a bit further down the river, the guide dropped us off at a sandbar to wait for the bore to come in. There, my group and I ran around, displaying actions that can be accurately described as frolicking. At one point I got in the water and tried to swim against the current, only to get sucked about 50 feet down the river. Nature won... this time...

When waves became visible in the distance, we were ushered back into the boat and proceeded to go head on into the oncoming bore. A big wave about five feet high was coming at us and we smacked into it with such force that my shoes, which I had been hanging onto for dear life, went flying. We salvaged one, but the other was lost to the water.

After the initial bore, about an hour's worth of crashing, insane waves followed. We would bring the boat up to where the waves started, gun 'er up, and in short bursts jump over wave after wave after wave. The boat was always full of water and the next wave was always ready to slap you in the face. This, friends, is my idea of fun. It was exhilarating! My knuckles were white from hanging onto the stupid rope, and once I got thrown into the centre of the boat, crashing into various knees and feet.

The peak of the trip came when we neared a rock formation that sent waves crashing at us from all directions in a froth of white-water. Not only would they get you from the front, but water would be spraying in from all sides. Somehow, we held on. I think that's a point for us... take that, Nature!

After the waves subsided, we jumped off the boat and went for a swim (AKA getting pulled around by the current). Without even noticing, we were sucked about 100 feet down the river. Luckily, the boat followed.

As a end to our trip, we were taken to a spot on the shore that formed a natural pool. All along the sides of it was slippery mud, perfect for sliding. Fun, but gross; at one point my leg was swallowed up by about three feet of especially disgusting ooze.

Dirty and tired, we were sent back to the dock. Shoeless (why do I always end up losing ONE shoe?), I moaned and griped as I walked back to the lodge on the gravel walk-way, which left awesome dents on my already abused feet.

There, we washed the mud out of our hair and went home. I fear I might now have some kind of taste for "extreme" sports. That's right... SPORTS. EXTREME ONES! I am an ADRENALINE JUNKIE. I might have to look into surfing, or something. Or maybe just go tidal bore rafting again next summer. Yes, that's the ticket.

Too weird to live, and too rare to die

2008-08-15T05:06:00.000-07:00

After yesterday's barbecue, I scurried back to my apartment to watch which a movie called the Tenant that Andrew had been raving about lately. What started as a seemingly docile film that might have strayed a little into the paranormal turned into one of the weirdest films I've seen in my life.

Which, of course, got me thinking... "Lauren, why do you watch so many weird movies?" and "Can these movies be compiled into a top-ten list for your blog?" ... The answers are "Because!" and "Yes"! Read on...

The Tenant (Le Locataire) -- 1976 -- 7.8 on IMDB

"A quiet and inconspicuous man (Trelkovsky) rents an apartment in France where the previous tenant committed suicide."

Think your neighbours drive you crazy? Watch this movie and see the real depths of insanity that bad neighbours can provoke. Bonus: an Egyptian cult and a prominent director who cross-dresses.

What Is It? -- 2005 -- 6.5 on IMDB

"Being the adventures of a young man whose principle interests are snails, salt, a pipe, and how to get home. As tormented by an hubristic, racist inner psyche."

Many snails are killed. Anton LaVey plays organ. The Manson Family sings songs. A man in black-face insists that he is Michael Jackson. The weird scale has been tipped.

Cannibal Ferox -- 1981 -- 4.9 on IMDB

"Three friends out to disprove cannibalism meet two men on the run who tortured and enslaved a cannibal tribe to find emeralds, and now the tribe is out for revenge."

Let's just say they don't disprove cannibalism...

Little Otik (Otesánek) -- 2000 -- 7.3 on IMDB

"When a couple learn that they cannot have children, the husband finds a piece of root in the backyard and shapes it into a child. His wife takes the root as her baby and pretends that it's real. When the root takes life they have gained a child; but its appetite becomes a problem...

STOP-MOTION TREE BABY THAT EATS PEOPLE.

Gokudô kyôfu dai-gekijô: Gozu -- 2003 -- 7.0 on IMDB

"The fate of two brothers follows a twisted path filled with violence, mother's milk, strange locals, and ultimately the disappearance of one brother's corpse."

The synopsis does not give any indication of how insane this movie becomes. The last scene in the film made me laugh and scarred me for laugh simultaneously. FYI: Gozu means "Cow Head".

El Topo (The Mole) -- 1970 -- 7.4 on IMDB

"See the naked young Franciscans whipped with cactus. See the bandit leader disemboweled. See the priest ride into the sunset with a midget and her newborn baby. What it all means isn't exactly clear, but you won't forget it."

The director of this film officiated at Marilyn Manson and Dita Von Teese's wedding. Cool guy.

L'Âge d'or (The Golden Age) -- 1930 -- 7.7 on IMDB

"A man and a woman are passionately in love with one another, but their attempts to consummate that passion are constantly thwarted, by their families, the Church and bourgeois society."

Salvador Dali + Luis Buñuel = fun. Plus, you've probably already seen Un Chien Andalou.

Palindromes -- 2004 -- 6.9 on IMDB

"Aviva is thirteen, awkward and sensitive. Her mother Joyce is warm and loving, as is her father, Steve, a regular guy who does have a fierce temper from time to time. The film revolves around her family, friends and neighbors."

What they neglect to say is that Aviva is played by a different actor in every scene. Including the large black woman pictured.

Polyester -- 1981 -- 6.6 on IMDB

"A suburban housewife's world falls apart when her pornographer husband admits he's serially unfaithful to her, her daughter gets pregnant, and her son is suspected of being the foot-fetishist who's been breaking local women's feet."

If you were lucky enough to see this in theatres, you received a scratch and sniff card that you were instructed to use at key points in the movie. Gross!

The Grandmother -- 1970 -- 7.3 on IMDB

" A young boy plants some strange seeds and they grow into a grandmother."

All of David Lynch's short films are deeply disturbing. This one especially, as it manages to be sad as well as creepy.

...So who wants to have a movie-night with me?

I don't know how to pronounce "meme"...

2008-08-14T07:30:00.001-07:00

...but I can fill them out. I feel like I've been neglecting music lately in the wake of losing my iPod and spending way too much time in front of the TV / at the movie theater. My last.fm profile looks shameful, filled with bands that I haven't liked in years.

Anywho, I'm going to take a crack at this meme in hopes that some fair reader can gauge my musical tastes and offer some sort of recommendation. Please note that I actually had a dream about the Unicorns the other night thus am certifiably crazy.

Look at me go: my favourite album from each year starting the year I was born.

1985: Tom Waits: Rain Dogs

1986: Bad Brains: I Against I

1987: HELIX had an album out this year, but I will go against my undying love for HELIX and say Marianne Faithful: Strange Weather

1988: Leonard Cohen: I’m Your Man

1989: Pixies: Doolittle

1990: Sonic Youth: Goo

1991: Nirvana: Nevermind

1992: STP: Core

1993: Radiohead: Pablo Honey

1994: Weezer: Blue Album

1995: Smashing Pumpkins: Melon Collie and the Infinite Sadness

1996: Sleater-Kinney: Call the Doctor

1997: Elliot Smith: Either/Or

1998: Neutral Milk Hotel: In the Aeroplane Over the Sea

1999: Our Lady Peace: Happiness... Is Not A Fish That You Can Catch

2000: I feel like this year sucked. Outkast: Stankonia because "Bombs over Baghdad" is my jam.

2001: Tool: Lateralus

2002: The Tragically Hip: In Violet Light

2003: The Dresden Dolls: The Dresden Dolls

2004: Arcade Fire: Funeral

2005: Buck 65: Secret House Against the World

2006: Tom Waits: Orphans: Brawler, Bawlers, and Bastards

2007: Peaches: Impeach My Bush

2008: The Mountain Goats: Heretic Pride

(I found this harder, and harder to complete as I neared the present. 2000 to now hurt my head. I am an old woman.)

You guys wanna see a dead body?

2008-08-05T12:07:00.000-07:00

The things you do for film, man. Last weekend it was huddling under a water-logged blanket while fog from the harbour rolled in. The alFresco Film Festival always reminds me of what the movie experience should be like. There's an excitement and other-worldliness to camping out near the boardwalk, the waves at your back, while a screen glows through the cold, damp air. We'll ignore the fact that afterwards I felt like I had pneumonia---it was so darn cool.

Last week's double feature was Almost Famous and Say Anything---two definite favourites, and movies I love to sing along with. Other folks must share my sentiments, as "Tiny Dancer" invoked a sing-along like no other. Tomorrow, Stand By Me is playing, followed by next Friday's screening of the Goonies. Foolishly enough, watching Lost Boys 2 (gag) actually make me really excited to see these two films again. Feldman at his prime is something to witness (I'm serious). The AFF should have called this year's line-up "Movies That Make Lauren Happy".

Another movie that will make me happy is this year's big ticket: Blindness, aka a film based on the best novel I've read this year so far. I'm not a huge fan of any of the actors involved, but the preview looks so dead-on that I don't think they can screw it up too badly. I have faith, okay.

The premise is simply, yet terrifying: what would happen if everyone around you went blind? Think Lord of the Flies meets some kind of Old Testament plague. Worth reading, and, hopefully, worth watching.

So, maybe I'll be seeing some of you tomorrow for a little Feldman/Pheonix/Wheaton/O'Connell/KEIFER action. Based on last week's experience, I recommend you bring:

1) A non-broken chair. Much better than the broken one that threatened to tip backwards and squish the cute dog sitting behind it.
2) A water-proof jacket or umbrella to combat the MIST and/or THE FOG (depends whether your affiliation is w/ Stephen King or John Carpenter)!
3) A hooded sweater you can pull over your freezing ears.
4) Snacks for sharing (with me).
4) A big blanket that can cover you and at least three of your shivering friends.

See you at the movies!

What It Is and How It Is Done

2008-07-31T04:50:00.000-07:00

Being only human, I cannot form the words that accurately describe how amazing last night was. For the past week I've been answering questions of "Who?" and "Why?" when the real question, it seems, was: What Is It?

Last night's performance started late. After Tuesday's canceled performance, this set the crowd of over 100 on edge. Waiting was kind of fun, though, especially when you're with a group with such a rare common interest. We tried to talk one guy out of getting his Back to the Future box-set signed, while I feebly attempted to start a sing-a-long to "Ben".

When we entered the theatre, classical music was playing, and the screen showed a cover of on of Glover's books, Concrete Inspection (Glover specializes in re-worked or cut-up Victorian-era instruction manuals). Finally, the lights dimmed and our hero took the stage and announced he would read from eight of his books. What followed was probably my favourite part of the evening, where he ranted, whispered, and joyfully led us through a series of books that had everyone laughing. His readings were accompanied by the Big Slide Show---excerpts and illustrations from his books. After the show I bought my favourite book---Rat Catching.

After the Big Slide Show, Glover introduced What Is It?---a film that took him years to create. He has been touring with this film since 2005. In 2007 he began touring with its sequel: It is Fine. EVERYTHING IS FINE!

What is It? is, at first, a bit jarring. After the first ten minutes, though, you begin to sense a sort of rhythm and forgot what made you so uncomfortable. The film's cast, except for Glover and a man called the Minstrel, all have Down Syndrome, but do not play people with Down Syndrome. This is key. The actors were not chosen for any exploitative purpose or "shock" value, but simply because they were good actors and brought a certain interest to the film. Seeing as the film itself is a piece of art that stands up to show what corporate film dare not even whisper, the fact that the actors are disabled is a testament to what their roles would be in "normal film": probably nothing.

I appreciated the film, not necessarily as an adventure in storytelling, but as something that promotes intellectual discourse. Subjects are brought up so they can be thought about and question. This is why Glover has the Q&A after the film: so we could talk, ask questions, and gain insight.

After graciously fielding a few questions and showing us the trailer to It is Fine. EVERYTHING IS FINE!, we all poured out of the theatre and lined up for a book signing. Rat Catching in hand, Andrew and I spoke to Glover briefly about what the film-making process is like for him, his work as a character actor, and so forth. He was such a pleasant and intelligent man, and promised that he'd be back in town, soon, with his next film (gracious after the poor planning that went into this).

This has been such a good year for me, in terms of the folks I've gotten to see perform. Ozzy, Leonard, Bob, and now Crispin. Who is next, friends? Who is next?

What to do on a sunny Sunday...

2008-07-28T07:15:00.001-07:00

1. Sleep in, thanks to the gracious behaviour of one's cat. She must've felt like I deserved it.

2. Check out some yardsales. Between the boyfriend and I, we now have 7 or 8 movies (all but one are Woody Allen films) that we got for the low, low price of three dollars. Andrew also has a wind-up 8mm camera that seems to be in perfect working condition, and even comes with film! Good thing he mysteriously has a 8mm projector...

3. Hang out in my grandparents' backyard. Their garden is beautiful, with yummy veggies and pretty flowers cohabitating nicely. Around the side of the house, Howard Dill pumpkins are just starting to grow. I'm going to take photos of their progress... we might have a 500 pounder before Hallowe'en!

4. Eat a different and delicious supper. I forget whose idea it was, but we used portobello mushrooms as a base to make "pizza". Roasted mushrooms + cheese + homemade tomato sauce + veggies = heaven!

5. Watch a good movie. My lovely co-worker, Sue, was kind enough to lend me a bunch of movies. I just got around to watching Withnail and I, which was the funniest movie I've seen in AGES.

It's back to work today, but I've got a four-day weekend coming up---hopefully it'll be as good as this one.

"They're Shooting the Buffalo."

2008-07-25T08:11:00.000-07:00

People... CRISPIN GLOVER, famous for roles such as GEORGE MCFLY, WILLARD, and LAUREN'S SECRET BOYFRIEND, is coming to town. Someone get excited with me! I don't care if he doesn't make a lick of sense---I just want to hear him talk in his oddly hypnotic, atonal voice. I would like to hear him say, "I'm trying to make my lunch!", or, and this would be sublime, serenade us with a verse from the epic "Clowny Clown Clown."

Yes, friends, it is a good time in our fair municipality when we can entertain the likes of Crispy. I'm working on a potential scheme to get him to go out for drinks with me after his film screening. Let's just say I know a place.

If you're not hip to C. Glover's work yet, check out his crazy website. Glover basically funds his books and films by taking "mainstream" roles (i.e. Charlie's Angels), which I can respect. The film that will be shown is called What Is It?---the first film of a trilogy. The film was written, directed, produced, and edited by Glover... and he also stars in it, along with a cast of actors who, I believe, all have Down's Syndrome. I am in love!

Crispin Glover will be showing a screening of What is It? at the Ondaatje Theatre, McCain Arts & Social Sciences Building on the 29th and 30th. Screenings start at 7:00 pm. Admission is $20.00.